Israel’s New Governing Coalition United by Desire To Be in Governing Coalition


By Joanie Weiss

Published March 14, 2013.
  • Print
  • Share Share
kurt hoffman

The Daily Backward is the Forward’s satirical Purim counterpart. Enjoy!

After weeks of political maneuvering, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu has managed to overcome ideological differences and unite a new governing coalition behind a shared commitment to what coalition documents call “being in on the action.”

“We can focus on the things that divide us, like the peace process,” said Netanyahu at a press conference announcing the coalition agreement, barely a week before the visit of U.S. President Barack Obama. “Or we can turn our attention to the things that unite us, like a love of fancy offices, chauffeured cars and chances to be on television.”

Tzipi Livni, whose Hatnuah party campaigned almost entirely on its desire for a two-state solution, said that entering a coalition with little hope of restarting peace negotiations was perfectly consistent with her platform. “My constituents put their faith in my experience, and my experience has taught me that being part of the opposition is just terrible,” Livni explained to reporters.

New political superstar Yair Lapid concurred with Livni, stating that although he had given in on promises to back peace and gay marriage, “You have to weigh those sacrifices against what we’ve gained — namely, some pretty incredible views of the Israel Museum and the chance to hang out with Clooney at Davos.”

Meanwhile, Labor supremo Shelly Yachimovich said that by remaining in opposition, her party was sticking to its principles of not being in charge of anything. “For the past 12 years, our constituents have been able to vote for us in the confidence that we will not have to run so much as an ice cream stand,” Yachimovich told the Backward. “Today we reaffirm that promise.”


The Jewish Daily Forward welcomes reader comments in order to promote thoughtful discussion on issues of importance to the Jewish community. In the interest of maintaining a civil forum, The Jewish Daily Forwardrequires that all commenters be appropriately respectful toward our writers, other commenters and the subjects of the articles. Vigorous debate and reasoned critique are welcome; name-calling and personal invective are not. While we generally do not seek to edit or actively moderate comments, our spam filter prevents most links and certain key words from being posted and The Jewish Daily Forward reserves the right to remove comments for any reason.





Find us on Facebook!
  • "What I didn’t realize before my trip was that I would leave Uganda with a powerful mandate on my shoulders — almost as if I had personally left Egypt."
  • Is it better to have a young, fresh rabbi, or a rabbi who stays with the same congregation for a long time? What do you think?
  • Why does the leader of Israel's social protest movement now work in a beauty parlor instead of the Knesset?
  • What's it like to be Chagall's granddaughter?
  • Is pot kosher for Passover. The rabbis say no, especially for Ashkenazi Jews. And it doesn't matter if its the unofficial Pot Day of April 20.
  • A Ukrainian rabbi says he thinks the leaflets ordering Jews in restive Donetsk to 'register' were a hoax. But the disturbing story still won't die.
  • Some snacks to help you get through the second half of Passover.
  • You wouldn't think that a Soviet-Jewish immigrant would find much in common with Gabriel Garcia Marquez. But the famed novelist once helped one man find his first love. http://jd.fo/f3JiS
  • Can you relate?
  • The Forverts' "Bintel Brief" advice column ran for more than 65 years. Now it's getting a second life — as a cartoon.
  • Half of this Hillel's members believe Jesus was the Messiah.
  • Vinyl isn't just for hipsters and hippies. Israeli photographer Eilan Paz documents the most astonishing record collections from around the world:http://jd.fo/g3IyM
  • Could Spider-Man be Jewish? Andrew Garfield thinks so.
  • Most tasteless video ever? A new video shows Jesus Christ dying at Auschwitz.
  • "It’s the smell that hits me first — musty, almost sweet, emanating from the green felt that cradles each piece of silver cutlery in its own place." Only one week left to submit! Tell us the story of your family's Jewish heirloom.
  • from-cache

Would you like to receive updates about new stories?




















We will not share your e-mail address or other personal information.

Already subscribed? Manage your subscription.