The trouble with temptation is that it’s so damn tempting. This, it seems, is a problem when it comes to keeping Jews in the fold. But perhaps instead of seeking to steep young Jews exclusively in tradition, we should embrace the horrors of gentile ways.
In a tearful televised confession, New York Yankees slugger Alex Rodriguez yesterday confirmed long-rumored allegations of performance-enhancing kabbalah use during a live interview with ESPN baseball analyst Peter Gammons. Citing pressure to stay competitive, Rodriguez acknowledged resorting to the practice of esoteric Jewish mysticism on multiple occasions since being introduced to its mysterious and perplexing power by pop chanteuse and rumored paramour Madonna, a prominent Kabbalangelist.