Does Madoff Have Cancer?

Bernie Madoff may be dying of cancer, the New York Post reports. Though the speculation is heavy and the sources are few, inmates told the Post that Madoff has been taking 20 pills each day, and that he is not well. The implication that Madoff took the fall alone for his $65 billion dollar Ponzi scheme because of what may or may not be life-threatening cancer was not lost on us:

Both Madoff’s wife and lawyer were unable to be reached by the Post to confirm or deny a cancer diagnosis, though the type of cancer is rumored to be pancreatic.

In an interesting twist of the spiritual, Madoff is allegedly attending weekly Native American religious rituals with fellow inmates that incorporate hot rock sweat baths and pipe-smoking. Maybe he’s looking to get as far away from his Jewishness as possible. We can probably speak for Jews everywhere when we say that the Jews don’t mind.

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