After hundreds of fans in Tampa bolted on her following anti-Trump jokes, Amy Schumer responded on Tuesday with a heartfelt ‘apology’ at Madison Square Garden.
Reading an open letter to the New York crowd, Schumer managed a show of unequivocal contrition: “Dearest Tampa, I’m sorry you didn’t want me, a comedian who talks about what she believes in, to mention the biggest thing going on in our country right now.”
She continued, “After the show, I want you to know that I will go straight to a rehab facility that will teach me how to make all people happy. Both the rich, entitled, white people who are gonna vote for him and the very poor people, who’ve been tricked into it.”
At the Tampa show — which 10,000 people attended – upset some 200 folks bolted when she described Republican nominee Donald Trump, in almost purely factual terms, as an “orange, sexual-assaulting, fake-college-starting monster.”
She added, “You know what I love? A famous guy that will just take me furniture shopping and just straight up grab my pussy.”
Starting the letter on a conciliatory note, she ended it that way, too: “I look forward to putting this all behind us in a couple weeks when Hillary Clinton is our MOTHERFUCKING PRESIDENT!”