Skip To Content
JEWISH. INDEPENDENT. NONPROFIT.
Life

The Ten Steps to Becoming a Great Dad

In a recent essay for the Forward, columnist Lenore Skenazy asked why Jewish moms have such a “definitive brisket-braising/doctor-raising image” while Jewish dads are roaming around the world stereotypeless?

Hey dads, follow these ten steps and you will become our cup of tea! Image by Wikimedia Commons

Skenazy pushes forward, searching for the true essence of Jewish fatherdom. Incessant people-pleaser? Pushover? Closet worrier? Nobody knows for certain.

Well, if Jewish dads really are such a blank slate, we thought we would make a few suggestions of who they could be. Here we present the ten steps to becoming the most awesome, feminist, supportive papa around. Consider it a Father’s Day gift, from the Sisterhood.

1) Take paternity leave, if you have it.

2) Ask for paternity leave, if you don’t.

3) Occasionally ask if we need help, even if we seem okay. Because sometimes we get so caught up in our busyness that we forget that help is even an option.

4) Ask us for help. We don’t want you to be superman any more than we want to be superwoman. Superman is not sustainable.

5) Don’t just help cook dinner, but actually plan dinner. That means think of what we are having, procuring the ingredients and then making it.

6) Be nice to our mothers.

7) Be nice to our sisters.

8) Let us sleep in once a week. We promise to do the same for you.

9) If we are spending a suspicious amount of time in the bathroom and you suspect we are reading our Twitter feed or celebrity gossip instead of eh, you know, give us five more minutes.

10) Never ever lie to your boss if you have to pick up our kid from school because he or she is sick. Bosses need to know that dads are parents too.

11) Bonus step: Make us a cup of tea.

Republish This Story

Please read before republishing

We’re happy to make this story available to republish for free, unless it originated with JTA, Haaretz or another publication (as indicated on the article) and as long as you follow our guidelines. You must credit the Forward, retain our pixel and preserve our canonical link in Google search.  See our full guidelines for more information, and this guide for detail about canonical URLs.

To republish, copy the HTML by clicking on the yellow button to the right; it includes our tracking pixel, all paragraph styles and hyperlinks, the author byline and credit to the Forward. It does not include images; to avoid copyright violations, you must add them manually, following our guidelines. Please email us at [email protected], subject line “republish,” with any questions or to let us know what stories you’re picking up.

We don't support Internet Explorer

Please use Chrome, Safari, Firefox, or Edge to view this site.