Posts Tagged: friendship Results 10
What does the expression “female friendship” evoke for you? Intense childhood or adolescent bonds? Lifelong connections among women, outlasting romantic relationships (of any sexual orientation)? Or does “female” seem gratuitous? Male friendship tends to just go by “friendship.” (If nothing else, “female friendship” produces far more Google results.) In the Atlantic, Megan Garber reviews a new book by linguist Deborah Tannen, “You’re the Only One I Can Tell: Inside the Language of Women’s Friendships.” And it sounds fascinating:
In 1936, 12 young Jewish girls in Hillside, NJ, faced a dilemma. At ages 7 and 8, they were interested in joining their local Brownie troop—but they and their families felt less than comfortable with troop’s choice of a local church as a meeting place when secular spaces were available. Worse, having faced some anti-Semitic behaviors at school, they were not sure they would be welcome as troop members.
Does a woman need to give up friendships with members of the opposite sex when she marries a man? For Rabbi Rachel Miller Solomin, the answer is yes.
According to Ann Friedman in her post “Shine Theory: Why Powerful Women Make the Best Friends,” over at NYMag.com, we should seek out women who are more together or successful than we are. She writes:
I will always remember this one Shabbat dinner in my tiny studio on the Upper West Side of Manhattan. It was wintertime and I had been preparing the meal for three days: shopping for groceries after work, hauling heavy bags up to my fifth-floor walk up, and chopping, slicing and simmering into the wee hours of the night with Cat Stevens and Bob Dylan by my side. I was famous for my Shabbat meals back then and, like most weeks, I was expecting a lot of friends. Twenty-five people staggered in on that particularly snowy night. With big coats and heavy boots left at the door, guests squished together around my table chatting, singing and eating the dishes I had carefully prepared the night before. It was perfect. And then it wasn’t. While everyone was laughing and having a ball between chicken and dessert, I looked around at all of these friends I had made and suddenly realized I felt totally empty and alone. It was a painful, frightening moment for me and I knew something had to change.