Yiddishe Momma (No Longer) For Sale

James Doyan, A British man from North London, has done what generations of harassed Jewish sons only wish was possible: put his mother up for sale on eBay.

“My Yiddishe Momma for sale. Beautiful, great cook, educated, articulate, family focused, caring — priceless,” read the ad, according to a recent article in Britain’s Jewish Chronicle.

Doyan was apparently trying help his mother, 63-year-old Sandi Firth, find a mate after “having enough of her exploits in trying to find love.”

The ad was taken down, unsurprisingly, for breaching eBay’s policy not to sell “human body parts and remains” (hair, however, is permissible). By the time Doyan was caught, his mother had reached a whopping £1.60.

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