Skip To Content
JEWISH. INDEPENDENT. NONPROFIT.
News

White House Is Bugged by Flies

NEWS ITEM: For inexplicable reasons, the White House is being assailed by swarms of flies, creating a massively embarrassing and annoying situation.


To everyone’s immense surprise
The White House is besieged by flies.
They pester the chief resident.
(We mean, of course, the president.)

Throughout the area they flit,
Who knows what ailments they transmit?
Although of proof there is no shred,
Some say they were inherited
From Bush’s days as chief exec,
A legacy of speck, by heck!

Now window-screens are being plugged,
And room by room, the House debugged.
The staffers, it has been revealed,
Fly swatters are required to wield.
Their militance they gratify
By wreaking havoc on the fly.
All geared for combat, they delight
In swatting flies in mid-air flight.
So avidly they stalk, it seems
The White House oft with swat-teams teems.

Their goal is worthy and high-flown:
“Make Washington a no-fly zone.”
No longer does it pay at all
To be a fly upon the wall.
The days have passed and are goneby
When staffers wouldn’t harm a fly.

Meanwhile, our mentor and our guide,
Obama, taking all in stride,
Today okaying an appointment,
Checks for flies within the ointment.
He’s calm, collected, cool and wise,
And never off the handle flies.

‘Tis fitting that on White House grounds
The very latest buzz abounds.

Republish This Story

Please read before republishing

We’re happy to make this story available to republish for free, unless it originated with JTA, Haaretz or another publication (as indicated on the article) and as long as you follow our guidelines. You must credit the Forward, retain our pixel and preserve our canonical link in Google search.  See our full guidelines for more information, and this guide for detail about canonical URLs.

To republish, copy the HTML by clicking on the yellow button to the right; it includes our tracking pixel, all paragraph styles and hyperlinks, the author byline and credit to the Forward. It does not include images; to avoid copyright violations, you must add them manually, following our guidelines. Please email us at [email protected], subject line “republish,” with any questions or to let us know what stories you’re picking up.

We don't support Internet Explorer

Please use Chrome, Safari, Firefox, or Edge to view this site.