RFK Jr.’s poems to Olivia Nuzzi are peak cringe — so were King Solomon’s
In biblical times and, apparently, in our current era, erotica is in the eye of the beholder
Robert F. Kennedy Jr. and the journalist Olivia Nuzzi. Courtesy of Getty Images
By Mira Fox November 24, 2025
Imagine receiving a love poem that reads: “Your breasts are like two fawns, twins of a gazelle, browsing among the lilies,” going on to say that they are a “mount” that the author wishes to “betake” himself to.
That particular line is from the Song of Songs, the sexiest book in the bible. But it doesn’t sound all that different from the poetry that Robert F. Kennedy Jr. allegedly wrote to journalist Olivia Nuzzi during what she claims was a purely “digital” affair between the two of them.
“Yr open mouth awaiting my harvest,” the former presidential candidate and current Secretary of Health and Human Services texted Nuzzi according to Ryan Lizza, her ex-fiancé; he released the “poetry” in a series of tell-all Substack posts about the affair.
The nature metaphors go on, as he allegedly instructs Nuzzi to “drink” from him: “‘Don’t spill a drop,’” he exhorts Nuzzi. “I am a river. You are my canyon. I mean to flow through you.”
This thinly-veiled description of a blow job is going viral online, where people cannot stop making fun of RFK’s literary stylings. “This is why we need better education in the humanities,” joked one post.
But the quality of love poems — or sexts, or erotica — is often in the eye of the beholder. (Though there are a few timeless classics, like The Book of O.) From inside the relationship, already dizzied by lust or love, the sexual descriptions can read as head-spinningly romantic even if, from the outside, they’re painfully awkward to read.
Perhaps this is also why the Song of Songs is usually interpreted allegorically, as a description of God’s love for the people of Israel, in Judaism. Later, Christians interpreted the book as a paean to the love between Jesus and the church. If it means what it seems to mean — if the breasts the author is lusting after are literally breasts — it’s just too racy. And, perhaps more importantly, too cringe.
The book is traditionally believed to be by King Solomon, one of the most venerated kings of ancient Israel, known for his wisdom. (Not incidentally, he is also known for his hundreds of wives and concubines.) And, of course, it’s included in the Bible, a holy text. And yet it is full of both open discussion of breasts and beauty, as well as metaphors that are about as subtle as RFK Jr.’s.
“His fruit is sweet to my mouth,” goes one line in the Song of Songs. “He brought me to the banquet room and his banner of love was over me.” Interpret that how you will, but eating sweet fruit seems thematically similar to opening one’s mouth to receive the bounty of a harvest.
Erotic texts were, in the era the Song of Songs was likely written, often part of the religious ceremonies of other traditions, particularly in fertility cults in the area. Still, how do you justify a great wise king discussing his lover’s breasts and dreaming of how her “rounded thighs are like jewels” — especially a king that was supposedly a titan of monotheism? Well, Rashi — one of the most famous Jewish textual commentators — interprets the breasts in the line “My beloved to me is a bag of myrhh, lodged between my breasts” as referring to “the two staves of the Ark.” Which seems like a stretch.
Of course, no one is trying to interpret RFK Jr.’s alleged poetry to be about God; he is nowhere near as venerated as King Solomon, and some of the other lines are less metaphorical. Plus, hundreds of years haven’t passed to blur the meaning of his words. But even with the centuries of interpretations, Solomon’s meaning is as clear as a freshwater stream. Or a river.
