State Left Unmanned in Dixie-Land
NEWS ITEM: South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford disappeared for a week, explaining he would be hiking in the mountains on vacation. Actually, he engaged in a secret tryst in Argentina with his inamorata.
Should we forbid a governor
From dallying with sweet amour?
His job is hard beyond belief,
So why deny him some relief?
South Carolina is the state
Whose governor just couldn’t wait.
To Argentina off he flew,
Sub rosa, to his sweetie-poo .
At home he left his lawful spouse,
Abandoned in their vacant house.
He told his staffers quite a fib:
That he was going hiking! Glib!
Cavorting in the Argentine,
The governor, adulterine,
Resembled more a fugitive
Than topmost state executive.
It never ceases to perplex,
What men will do, impelled by sex.
One must be hardened to resist
Enticements of romantic tryst.
What unsigned laws were on his desk
While he pursued the picaresque?
What duties did the gov neglect
While primal urges went unchecked?
Big problems rise in governance
When breathing comes with hottest pants.
Such happenstances should we rate
And simply dub “affairs of state”?
A message from our CEO & publisher Rachel Fishman Feddersen
I hope you appreciated this article. Before you go, I’d like to ask you to please support the Forward’s award-winning, nonprofit journalism during this critical time.
At a time when other newsrooms are closing or cutting back, the Forward has removed its paywall and invested additional resources to report on the ground from Israel and around the U.S. on the impact of the war, rising antisemitism and polarized discourse.
Readers like you make it all possible. Support our work by becoming a Forward Member and connect with our journalism and your community.
— Rachel Fishman Feddersen, Publisher and CEO