Skip To Content
JEWISH. INDEPENDENT. NONPROFIT.
News

State Left Unmanned in Dixie-Land

NEWS ITEM: South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford disappeared for a week, explaining he would be hiking in the mountains on vacation. Actually, he engaged in a secret tryst in Argentina with his inamorata.


Should we forbid a governor
From dallying with sweet amour?
His job is hard beyond belief,
So why deny him some relief?

South Carolina is the state
Whose governor just couldn’t wait.
To Argentina off he flew,
Sub rosa, to his sweetie-poo .

At home he left his lawful spouse,
Abandoned in their vacant house.
He told his staffers quite a fib:
That he was going hiking! Glib!

Cavorting in the Argentine,
The governor, adulterine,
Resembled more a fugitive
Than topmost state executive.

It never ceases to perplex,
What men will do, impelled by sex.
One must be hardened to resist
Enticements of romantic tryst.

What unsigned laws were on his desk
While he pursued the picaresque?
What duties did the gov neglect
While primal urges went unchecked?

Big problems rise in governance
When breathing comes with hottest pants.
Such happenstances should we rate
And simply dub “affairs of state”?

Republish This Story

Please read before republishing

We’re happy to make this story available to republish for free, unless it originated with JTA, Haaretz or another publication (as indicated on the article) and as long as you follow our guidelines. You must credit the Forward, retain our pixel and preserve our canonical link in Google search.  See our full guidelines for more information, and this guide for detail about canonical URLs.

To republish, copy the HTML by clicking on the yellow button to the right; it includes our tracking pixel, all paragraph styles and hyperlinks, the author byline and credit to the Forward. It does not include images; to avoid copyright violations, you must add them manually, following our guidelines. Please email us at [email protected], subject line “republish,” with any questions or to let us know what stories you’re picking up.

We don't support Internet Explorer

Please use Chrome, Safari, Firefox, or Edge to view this site.