DER YIDDISH-VINKL May 5, 2006
Once again, our genial genius, Stanley Siegelman, returns to Der Vinkl with his incomparable ability to unearth a rare bit of news and then make his poetic commentary on the event in both English and Yiddish. This time the news is about an Asiatic elephant that had been conceived through artificial insemination at Jerusalem’s Biblical Zoo. This is the first time such a birth has been achieved in Israel. Worldwide, only 11 Asiatic elephants have been born through artificial means.
Der Kintslekher Helfand
In erets Yis-ro-el m’kvelt!
Aza pasirung! Zogt di velt!
Vi lebedig di visnshaft!
Vi vunderlekh ir koyakh, kraft!
An helfand makht men, eyns un tsvey!
(Der kolir alemol iz “grey”.)
Ze vi azoy a pitsl “sperm”
Makht shoyn a groyse “pachyderm”!
Mir shepn nakhes fun der “zoo”:
Zey hobn dort gemakht a “coup”!
In Tel Aviv, der act’s bagrist:
Zey yoyvlin dortn gor umzist.
M’helft di khayes — eynes, tsvey, dray.
Bashafn kinder (“multiply”)
Di velt dervart a bisl nayes
Fun mer kintslekhe vilde khayes.
Nu, zol a Sabra zayn tsufridn?
M’fregt zikh: iz dos gut far yidn?
The Artificial Elephant
For Israel, another first!
With overwhelming pride we burst.
Technology, now procreant,
Gives rise to infant elephant!
One marvels that a man-aimed sperm
Can yield a fledgling pachyderm.
Will this success induce a spate
Of urges to inseminate?
Now many people smile becuz
The baby has a “langeh nuz,”
The deed is hailed in Tel Aviv,
Such breakthrough they can scarce conceive.
It gives new meaning to the cry,
“Be fruitful now and multiply!”
With bated breath the world awaits
More quadrupedal neonates.
And while the world awaits more news
We wonder, “Is this good for Jews?”
A message from our CEO & publisher Rachel Fishman Feddersen
I hope you appreciated this article. Before you go, I’d like to ask you to please support the Forward’s award-winning, nonprofit journalism during this critical time.
Now more than ever, American Jews need independent news they can trust, with reporting driven by truth, not ideology. We serve you, not any ideological agenda.
At a time when other newsrooms are closing or cutting back, the Forward has removed its paywall and invested additional resources to report on the ground from Israel and around the U.S. on the impact of the war, rising antisemitism and the protests on college campuses.
Readers like you make it all possible. Support our work by becoming a Forward Member and connect with our journalism and your community.
— Rachel Fishman Feddersen, Publisher and CEO
