Parents of American-Israeli hostage hope attending Biden’s State of the Union is one step closer to bringing their son home
The Alexander family, left to right: Edan, Yael, Roy, Mika, and Adi. Courtesy of Alexander family
By Debra Nussbaum Cohen March 6, 2024
Yael Alexander said she has barely slept and has had trouble eating since Hamas terrorists took her son Edan, 20, and dragged him into Gaza on Oct. 7.
“I just want to hug Edan, you know? I miss him so much,” she said on the road from her New Jersey home to Washington, D.C., where she will be a guest at President Biden’s State of the Union Thursday.
Before Edan, an Israeli-born, Jersey-raised IDF soldier, was taken, Yael spent her days baking and selling fancy cakes. All she does now, she said, is advocate for the release of her son. Relatives in Israel make the case for him there. Here, with her husband Adi, she talks to American officials and anyone else who will listen on the need for a deal to free all the hostages. She hopes her presence at the president’s televised address to the country will remind people of the hostages’ plight.
At the State of the Union, they will join more than a dozen other family members of hostages who have American citizenship.
New Jersey Rep. Josh Gottheimer, a Jewish Democrat, is hosting Adi as well as Jonathan Dekel-Chen, who is the father of hostage Sagui Dekel-Chen.
“Their presence is a strong reminder that Americans, including Adi’s son Edan and Jonathan’s son Sagui, are still being held hostage at hands of Hamas terrorists,” Gottheimer said in a Monday statement. “It’s been 150 days since they were captured. Nothing is more important than getting them home now. Period.”
Yael is being hosted by Rep. Donald Norcross, a Democrat from N.J. Hostage family members are being hosted by representatives of both parties. Speaker of the House Mike Johnson has invited as his guest Mia Schem, a freed Israeli hostage.
While in Congress, the Alexanders will bring what they wear every day: their son’s military ID, which Yael always has with her, and Edan’s original IDF dog tag, which Adi wears. Congress has a dress code, so they are not permitted to wear T-shirts with Edan’s picture or carry signs, as they have at countless marches and demonstrations from Tenafly to Tel Aviv. But they will be wearing yellow ribbons, which were also sent to all members of Congress with the hope that the politicians will wear them at the State of the Union.
“Going to the State of the Union is a great honor,” said Adi. “To be there, and for the administration to honor the parents and focus on the ongoing crisis” is important. They and other hostages’ relatives will be meeting with U.S. officials while in Washington, including National Security Adviser Jake Sullivan.
From laughter to horror
The last time Yael Alexander spoke with her son, Edan, it was early on the morning of Oct. 7. It was just before 7 a.m. and Edan was alone standing watch at his army post on the Gaza border. He was texting with his mother. The night before, his family Facetimed with him from their sukkah in Tel Aviv and all was well. The family was in Israel for the holiday. “Edan was laughing and saying he had his chicken and rice dinner but had to go to sleep early because he was starting guard duty at 5:30 a.m.,” said Yael.
The next morning, “he called me and told me that they were getting bombed. ‘It’s like a war here mom, I’m seeing terrible stuff.’ There was a lot of noise. I tried just to calm him, I said, ‘I’m here with you, I love you.’ That was their last phone call. All the texts I sent after didn’t go through,” Yael said.
Edan was born in Tel Aviv’s Ichilov Hospital 20 years ago — he had a birthday in December, while captive — and moved to the U.S. with his parents when he was 2 months old. They first lived in Rockville, Maryland, then moved to Tenafly, where their community has rallied around them since Edan was taken hostage.
“After Oct. 7 there were posts from all the Tenafly restaurants on Facebook because they know him. It’s Korean, Japanese, and Indian restaurants. This is the community. People know us, it doesn’t matter if you are Jewish or not. Everyone is supporting us in this hard time. Even the mayor took out billboards. There is a huge billboard in the middle of town, and one next to the basketball courts showing Edan’s kidnapped poster. It’s like a punch in the stomach each time I see it,” said Yael.
Edan is the oldest of three siblings. His sister Mika is 17, and a senior at Tenafly High School, from which her older brother graduated in 2022. Roy is 12 and will celebrate his bar mitzvah during Passover.
When Edan graduated, he was preparing for college like his classmates. He took the SAT exams twice, said his mother. But instead, he decided to join Garin Tzabar, a program preparing and supporting lone soldiers, who come from outside of Israel, to serve in the military. Though he had no obligation to enlist in the IDF, Edan wanted to serve.
That made his parents proud, they said. Until the Hamas attack, they weren’t worried about him serving in the Golani Brigade. “It was peacetime,” said Adi.
When the Hamas terrorists captured Edan, he was surrounded, forced to walk with them into Gaza, his parents said. They saw footage the terrorists recorded on a GoPro camera, which was later taken by the IDF during a battle. “It was the scariest movie I ever saw,” said Yael. They are holding onto hope that their son is still alive, though Hamas has offered no signs of life.
The Alexanders are hopeful that there will be progress toward a hostage release before or during the monthlong Muslim holiday of Ramadan, which begins Sunday evening.
“Ramadan is a good religious excuse and I hope they’re going to do it. If not, it will be a total disaster for everyone,” said Adi. “It will be a disaster for Gaza civilians, for hostages, for Israel’s economy, and for Israeli society,” said Adi. Added Yael, “Everyone will lose.”
“Every day I am in it,” Yael said “I am not losing the faith that eventually the deal will come and Edan will be free. You don’t have any option to think differently.”
Additional reporting by JTA.
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