Skip To Content
JEWISH. INDEPENDENT. NONPROFIT.
Community

I Survived The Holocaust — And Pittsburgh Brought The Old Fears Rushing Back

My name is Johanna Reiss. You may already know it; I am the Author of the memoir The Upstairs Room and other books about my experiences as a Jewish child hidden in Holland during World War II and how I managed to live through it.

Since 1945, I thought I was done with my old life, when being a Jew meant you had to live in fear or die.

I’m lucky. I survived the Holocaust, way way back when I was a Jewish child and lived in Holland, where we were allowed less and less freedom, until trucks or trains were sent to take us away.

I was lucky.

A family of farmers hid me for nearly three years in a room not much bigger than a crate.

In 1955 I moved to America, called the Land of the Free. I became an American Citizen and have loved living here in Manhattan. I never tire of the sights and energy of this city and the diversity of its people. The war that was, the hate against Jews and many others Hitler despised, it all paled here, and I seldom thought of it.

Until the morning of October 25, 2018, when I heard the news about the synagogue shooting in Pittsburgh.

I let 70 years pass before I started going to the synagogue after the Holocaust, and after Pittsburgh, now I was worried it wasn’t safe anymore.

The night of the 25th, a vigil took place close to where I live. I ought to go, I told myself, be part of mourning with others who probably also feel the same shock and pain.

I looked out of my window. Dark. Cold, too, no doubt.

Still I thought I ought to join the mourners. I put on a coat, hat, scarf, got my key and walked to the door.

What, though, if another creep saw me, and thought that woman looks like a Jew?

She should have been dead decades ago…How come she’s still around?

I took off my hat, hung up my coat, and closed the door again, making sure it was locked. I wasn’t brave enough to go out.

“Don’t do harm to children,” I want to yell to the world; it leaves scars that never go away.

Don’t discriminate, tell your children, do not hate. Respect others. That, already, might start to make the world a better place in which to live.

I hope you appreciated this article. Before you go, I’d like to ask you to please support the Forward’s award-winning journalism this Passover.

In this age of misinformation, our work is needed like never before. We report on the news that matters most to American Jews, driven by truth, not ideology.

At a time when newsrooms are closing or cutting back, the Forward has removed its paywall. That means for the first time in our 126-year history, Forward journalism is free to everyone, everywhere. With an ongoing war, rising antisemitism, and a flood of disinformation that may affect the upcoming election, we believe that free and open access to Jewish journalism is imperative.

Readers like you make it all possible. Right now, we’re in the middle of our Passover Pledge Drive and we need 500 people to step up and make a gift to sustain our trustworthy, independent journalism.

Make a gift of any size and become a Forward member today. You’ll support our mission to tell the American Jewish story fully and fairly. 

— Rachel Fishman Feddersen, Publisher and CEO

Join our mission to tell the Jewish story fully and fairly.

Our Goal: 500 gifts during our Passover Pledge Drive!

Republish This Story

Please read before republishing

We’re happy to make this story available to republish for free, unless it originated with JTA, Haaretz or another publication (as indicated on the article) and as long as you follow our guidelines. You must credit the Forward, retain our pixel and preserve our canonical link in Google search.  See our full guidelines for more information, and this guide for detail about canonical URLs.

To republish, copy the HTML by clicking on the yellow button to the right; it includes our tracking pixel, all paragraph styles and hyperlinks, the author byline and credit to the Forward. It does not include images; to avoid copyright violations, you must add them manually, following our guidelines. Please email us at [email protected], subject line “republish,” with any questions or to let us know what stories you’re picking up.

We don't support Internet Explorer

Please use Chrome, Safari, Firefox, or Edge to view this site.