Here is how it happens. First, demagogues use incendiary rhetoric to inflame passions against a group or individual. Next, a “lone gunman” attacks the target(s) of that rhetoric. Then, the same demagogues who fanned the flames in the first place condemn the attack, express shock — shock! — that such a thing could ever have happened.
Sound familiar?
Most recently, of course, this pattern has unfolded in connection with the August 1 attack on a gay youth group in Tel Aviv. Leaders of the Shas party — who had denounced gay people for “carrying out the self-destruction of Israeli society and the Jewish people” (Knesset member Nissim Ze’ev), called them “toxic as bird flu” (same) and accused them of, get this, causing earthquakes (former health minister Shlomo Benizri) — are now bending over backwards to express how shocked they are that someone might take their words so seriously.
But we’ve been through this before, haven’t we? Ultra-conservative talk show hosts rail against an evil federal government, and then express shock that Timothy McVeigh would attack a federal building. Far-rightist Israelis denounce Yitzhak Rabin as a traitor who must be stopped, and then the leaders who whipped up their frenzy shed crocodile tears when someone “stops” him. It’s déjà vu all over again.
Now, there is one thing different about the Tel Aviv attack: We still don’t know who did it. The attacker may well have been from the Haredi community, like the man I watched stab three participants in the 2005 Jerusalem Pride Parade. But according to my gay friends in Israel, the word on the street is that it had to be someone who knew of this group, or may have even been part of it himself of herself — after all, it was in a relatively anonymous apartment house basement. Perhaps we’ll soon learn the truth.
But in terms of what we should all learn from this attack, and do as a response to it, the identity of the attacker really doesn’t matter. Whether the attacker was a Shas-nik or a self-hating gay teenager, the fact is that homophobic rhetoric leads to homophobic violence.
Indeed, most perpetrators of homophobic violence are also the victims of it. According to the Israeli Welfare and Social Services Ministry, one-third of teenage suicides in Israel are kids questioning their sexuality. American statistics are similar. Self-hatred is a dangerous thing — I know, having experienced it myself for over a decade, and having pondered ending my life on a weekly, if not daily, basis. The worst perpetrators of anti-gay violence prey on themselves.
So what should we do, apart from writing checks to Israeli gay youth organizations? Well, here are three suggestions:
First, understand that anti-gay statements and actions do cause violence. Of course, this includes the outrageous statements that issue forth from some of our religious leaders and which should not be excused by post-hoc expressions of surprise. But it also includes little things, like a kid saying “that’s so gay” when he means “that’s stupid.” It includes a rabbi who winks at Shabbat violation or treyf food but equivocates about whether “homosexuality” is acceptable to God. Such messages are subtle, but they send an unmistakable message to children and bigots alike.
Second, let’s not use morality or the Bible to excuse ignorance or fear. If you personally are still unsure about whether it’s okay to be gay, that’s fine — I understand that all this is new for a lot of people. But let’s leave the religious judgment up to God. In the meantime, here on Earth, there are millions of people who are lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgendered and feel, as I do, that their sexual/gender identity is part of their neshamah. So learn more about sexual diversity, and about the lives of gay people. Ask your gay friends and relatives about their experiences. At the very least, a curious agnosticism is justified (there are many ways to understand a couple of biblical verses), but I think you’ll find that you’ll come to a fuller understanding of the value of sexual diversity.
Finally, let’s understand that the closet itself is part of the problem. It was heartbreaking to read that family members of one victim insisted that she was “just passing by” the meeting and “only there by chance.” It was even sadder to learn that some family members of the injured have refused to visit their own children in the hospital. Can you believe it? Believe it. Now imagine what it’s like to be that child.
That’s the power of the closet. And that, alas, is why gay youth support groups remain necessary, even in 2009, and even in a comparatively tolerant country like Israel. Despite all the gains, there is still the stigma, and if I’ve learned anything in the years I’ve spent as an LGBT religious activist, it’s that, for some people, it’s always square one. So if you care about what happened in Tel Aviv, send clear, proactive messages at home that love is what matters, not the gender of your beloved.
I appreciate that Shas politicians are now backpedaling on some of their more offensive statements, and that Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu was unequivocal in his condemnation of the attack. But that does not excuse the atmosphere of hatred (including self-hatred) that those same Shas politicians, and many of our rabbis, have helped create. Let me be clear: They, and all of us, are responsible. There are no “wild weeds,” as The Jerusalem Post labeled the gunman. Weeds grow in gardens, which ought not be neglected. There is plenty of work to do.
Jay Michaelson is the executive director of Nehirim: GLBT Jewish Culture and Spirituality. He writes The Polymath column for the Forward’s Arts & Culture section.
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In the Sarna article's comment section, the Vienese solution of excommunication of parasite sinful Ultra Orthodox Jews is noted as a solution.
Sounds good (excommunication of the demogogues, including those who are Ultra-Orthodox and spread hate in the exploitation of our precious Judaism). Best solution proposed, so far!
It is not about excommunication! I would think that Jay would never propose excommunication, because that is an experience that many queer Jews have been on the receiving end of. It is about holding our leaders, and the far-right in all countries, accountable; encouraging them to be aware of the "feathers in the wind" and the places in which those feathers find a home.
I am proud to be one of the many queer Jews who has received a cleansing of neshamah in the sanctified safe-spaces which have been talked about at many of the vigils around the country. And, at times like this, I am honored that we have leaders who can urge the larger community to take responsibility for their complacent participation in the destruction of "strangers in their midst."
Thank you for this article about a sad and shameful shooting. Incendiary speech is ona'ah, totally against Talmudic teaching. Its effects are deep and far-reaching. Shaming people in public is like spilling their blood -- and events like this show it is not a mere metaphor.
I don't agree with all of the Pharasee(ORTHODOX)Talmud, especially treatment of Gentiles and others (but) The history of Isreal being dispersed relates "judgement" from Elohim for practicing lifestyles learned from "pagan society".
This may be why alot of people are afraid and react in extreme ways. It is a shock to many to see Jews re-play in part lifestyles that caused the previous supernatural exhiles of the 10 tribes of Isreal, Benjamin and Yuhudah(Jews).
On both sides of this issue, many should consider their ways. My prayers,love, and hope go out to everyone involved.
I am always wondering how we can imagine that we can simply decide what to think...The hatred against gays (or Jews) is deeper than pious wishful thinking. People are afraid...because they were abandoned or abused as children and hence the violence as soultion. So whatever we think of gays (or Jews) we must all do sthing to educate the masses (and ouselves) on childhood abuse (including abandonment). Many people are probably genetically gay. So it is dangeraous to mention those who are traumatically gay: abandoned by father they trn to other males for eassurance but stiimes it gets sexualkized. But some of these people are straight. And cannot help not hate gays. The non-procreative element of gay sex reinforces this already ingrained doubt and it becomes hatred. If gays cd be more tolerant of those who try therapy (stimes successfully if the stuff gets addictive), some tension cd be lessened. No, it is not enough to "incite" someone to hatred - it is necessary that violent solutions are programmed durng childhood - non-racist and non-antigay killers and murderers all were abused and neglected during childhood, amny reesearch show. I simply think that this issue is too complicated for mass propganda - we simply are unable to see a comlpicated case like this. Some people need violence (due to childhood abandonment which is rampant, almost 50% of mothers in some periods got post-natal depresion) and some poeple get the self-hateing kin dof "traumatic" (non-genetic) gay-ness plus this - there is no therapy that can help. We have a"fate" too. Jay, you write a lot on kabbalah - you never read Ashlag (or the Berg or Laitman verison) : they mean it when they say that negative egoistic traits may cuase earthquaked. (not gays but egoist sex-addicts heteros too).And they say the Neshamah only starts to be built up when you start to learn kabbalah 8and strat to diminish yr ego and change yr behavior too...You still might have fathering deficit male fantasies and cravings but you stop acting them out randomly...And then of course yr self-hatred will diminish too.Self-respect comes from self-disicipline. I am sure someone will write that I am also inciting simply because I trie dto show that incitement is not enought the slef-distonic gays are a real issue that should be treated therapically...but gays effectively deny access to therapy to these traumatic gays. and then they say it is due to those who advocate therapy. And their responsibility (denying therapy) is simply in denial.We are all responsable, okay. But not only one side.
If mankind sin is great, yet are the grace and power of G-D greater! There is hope, the gripping power of G-D in our lives, of a great vision of a new society and a new quality of life. It is that dressing of hope, I want to put on and see, the love we can give each other, for it is through the power of our Ahvee Ahd that we all come into being, the Spirit of G-D made us---flesh, may the breath of the Almighty bring us forth into the kingdom of G-D and a new life in Him, our G-D of Host. Let him judge, us he knows our hearts and minds, this is almost too overwhelming to understand. Yet what is comforting is to know I need not judge anyone, for it is not my place.
For it is written....Psalm 50 And the heavens proclaim his righteousness, for G-D himself is judge. Shofayt