In 1926, when writer Ellin Mackay, heiress to the Comstock Lode mining fortune, fell in love with famed Jewish songwriter Irving Berlin, her Catholic father raged that they would marry “over my dead body.” When the couple eloped, he disinherited his daughter. After their civil ceremony, Ellin Berlin was dropped from the social registry — although her sister, who dated a Nazi and wore a diamond swastika, remained a member in good standing.
How times have changed.
On October 25, The New York Times announced the marriage of Jared Kushner, whose family name graces a New Jersey Orthodox Jewish day school, to Ivanka Trump, glamorous daughter of business tycoon and ubiquitous public personality Donald Trump. This unlikely union seemed so unremarkable that it didn’t even merit the “Vows” spotlight the Times frequently reserves for couples from divergent or unique backgrounds. Instead, the Times announcement straightforwardly noted: “Rabbi Haskel Lookstein is to officiate,” leaving it for those who read between the lines to understand that Ivanka had undergone a traditional religious conversion to Judaism prior to the Orthodox nuptials.
In part, the relative nonchalance that greeted this high-profile pairing reflects a sea-change over the last century in attitudes toward Jews in America: Marrying a Jew — even becoming a Jew, as Ivanka has done — no longer means removing oneself from high society. On the contrary, becoming a Jew may mean joining one of contemporary American society’s most enticing cultural streams.
Today, many non-Jews are familiar with and attracted to Jewish humor, food, music, literature, art and films, and also to Jewish social ideals and religious rituals. One thinks of “faux mitzvahs” in which pubescent non-Jewish boys and girls celebrate their coming of age, of non-Jewish weddings at which glasses are reportedly broken and cries of “mazel tov” are heard, and also of the participation of Christian friends in Jewish Sabbath and holiday meals.
Non-Jews now enjoy Passover Seders held in churches, and also at the homes of Jewish friends. An article in The Wall Street Journal by a reporter from its Boston bureau, for example, described a “Cambridge-style Passover Seder, BYOP, Bring Your Own Place Setting,” where only three of the 13 participants were Jewish. New York Times columnist Maureen Dowd recently reported that she had tried for years to get invited to her late colleague William Safire’s annual Seder.
The transformation of attitudes toward Jews and Judaism, however, is part of a larger shift in how Americans relate to ethnic and religious difference in general. An important juncture in those changes occurred during the late 1960s, when political and social trends transformed the landscape, and ethnic distinctiveness became something to celebrate, rather than to melt away. The growing acceptance of difference eventually evolved into a multicultural ethos that supports the juxtaposition of diverse backgrounds within individual lives and households.
To be sure, alongside the many opportunities it affords Jews, this evolving American reality also presents considerable challenges for the Jewish community. Many wonder how we can preserve a sense of Jewish peoplehood when traditional boundaries that had long defined ethnic Jewishness are becoming permeable and blurry.
Older American Jews — whether they are secular or religiously observant, communally affiliated or disconnected — often articulate a keen consciousness of Jewish peoplehood, highlighted by a clearly constructed “us” and “them.” That dichotomy, however, is increasingly difficult to maintain.
But there is another view of what constitutes ethnic identity. This view emphasizes ethnicity’s distinctive content — including language, values, behavior and culture — rather than the porous and shifting boundaries between ethnic groups. This tends to be how younger American Jews understand identity. In a marked change from the past, they embrace the particulars of Jewish culture but reject the “us and them” worldview of their elders. Jews in their 20s say they feel a strong attachment to Jewish ethnicity but tend to see Jewish music, food, books, comedy and cultural performance, family styles and religious rituals as their primary ethnic expressions. Unsurprisingly, this latter view of ethnicity tends to be more hospitable to Jews-by-choice.
Converts, of course, are not a monolithic group. They include activist, accommodating and ambivalent Jews — not unlike those born into the ethnicity. But in my 2006 study “Choosing Jewish: Conversations About Conversion” (American Jewish Committee), I discovered that those Orthodox, Conservative, Reform and Reconstructionist converts who are Jewishly active and involved identify not only with Judaism as a religion (as previous researchers had insisted) but also with Jewish peoplehood, with ethnic Jewishness. The process of learning and experience that serious converts undergo positions them perfectly to embrace not just Judaism as a religion, but also the cultural content that is nowadays often considered to define Jews as a distinctive people.
For many converts, Judaizing is a process that does not end with the formal conversion. They begin by asking important questions: What does it mean to be Jewish? What kind of Jew will I be? Some are hungry for and pursue intensification of their Jewishness throughout their adult years. The effectiveness of this Jewish enculturation is underscored by the fact that, as a group, converts into Judaism are in most ways statistically indistinguishable from born Jews in the strength and extensiveness of their Jewish connections.
Today in America, identifying with Jewishness is voluntary for Jews-by-descent as well as Jews-by-choice. The spiritual journeys of Jewishly passionate converts, supported by ongoing education, expressed through an embrace of a shared culture and a commitment to a redefined concept of peoplehood, may provide models for Jews of all backgrounds. Just as Jews-by-choice like Ivanka Trump have confronted Jewish existential questions, Jews of all shades must struggle with the meanings that can bind them to each other and to Jewish destiny.
Sylvia Barack Fishman is chair of the Department of Near Eastern and Judaic Studies at Brandeis University and co-director of the Hadassah-Brandeis Institute. She is the author, most recently, of “The Way Into the Varieties of Jewishness” (Jewish Lights, 2007).
The Forward welcomes reader comments in order to promote thoughtful discussion on issues of importance to the Jewish community. In the interest of maintaining a civil forum, the Forward requires that all commenters be appropriately respectful toward our writers, other commenters and the subjects of the articles. Vigorous debate and reasoned critique are welcome; name-calling and personal invective are not. While we generally do not seek to edit or actively moderate comments, the Forward reserves the right to remove comments for any reason.
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Perhaps a better question is "Is Jared Kushner Good for The Jews"
Recently 3 swastikas were placed on my synagogue in Edison N.J. Governor Corzine has given a fortune in charity to Churches to help him win the election in New Jersey. I am seeking a power political couple to help my synagogue. How about donating to my synagogue to help us purchase a security system ?. With all their combined fortune this would be a great Mitzvah.and they would be fantastic Jews .
Hyman, maybe living Jewish will teach Ivanka to be more giving and concerned for others. Then she'll go on to raise Jewish children to whom these personality traits will be second-nature.
Too bad the author didn't interview Ivanka. I'd be interested in hearing Miss Trump's reaction to what Judaism teaches. And then I'd like a future article about how her life has changed.
That Ms. Trump chose to undergo an Orthodox conversion is worthy of praise. In today's society, she could have easily taken a Reform converison, a Heeb subscription, or an interfaith vow, and still be accepted as a sister by most American Jews.
She chose to go Orthodox, and that's beautiful. Of course, there will be detractors willing to bet on how long the marriage will last, how she covers her hair, how much charity she gives, and what she eats.
But at this moment, we should celebrate the arrival of a new Jew to our community.
Jealousy is a sin; not a virtue. It makes no sense to post negative comments. I think we should all wish much luck to the new couple & welcome Ivanka to the family.
Rabbi Novak, a local Boston rabbi, makes a useful distinction between acculturation and assimilation. We can adapt to the wider culture, and recognize that the wider culture also uses us, without becoming "them."
How do you know that the Trumps aren't charitable??Maybe you should be more charitable with your non-welcoming comments. Ivanka stay away from negative people. They are just jealous. I am very happy that you joined my tribe. Maybe you can teach them something like Love Ye one Another. I love you Ivanka Jeanie
Religion is a cancer on society.Who cares if that person laying next to you is jewish, christian or atheist.What is important is that they are good and they love you and you love them.
As a convert myself, I think she will do O.K.
Ivanka, i'm sure, has other suitors who had wealth and were not Jews. The best of everything to them.
Congratulations to Ivanka and all the best to the happy couple. Ivanka's father Donald Trump has always been someone who appreciates others' gifts, and has shown clear appreciation for Jewish people he has worked with. He actually has or has taken on a number of Jewish mental and behavioural traits as well.
Mazel Tov to Ivanka and Jared. Ivanka is now one of us. She now has to prove herself to be a good Jew like the rest of the Jews whether living in Israel or outside of Israel. Same challenges different opportunities.
Yasher Koach to Ivanka, and at least they have a very chance of raising Jewish children, with Jewish values. Caroline Kennedy Schlossberg married a rich Jewish man, but, insisted that the children be raised Catholic. So, Ivanka, U Go Girl!
Excuse me "Ivanka's still a shiksa" and "hyman Schwartz" commenters and anyone else with something negative to say. I think Ivanka knows more about Judaism that you do. Did you ever hear of the 10 commandments where it says "Lo ta'ane be'reiacha eid shaker" - that you should not bear false witness against people? And what about the pasuk in Parshat Kedoshim that says "Lo telech rachil be'amecha" - that you shouldn't spread lashon harah about anyone? And what about all the mitzvot of how we are commanded to treat Geirim - converts - b/c we were once Geirim ourselves in Egypt. You don't know anything about Ivanka except what the media tells you. My sister works in the shul where she converted and saw her all the time and I'm so sick of hearing all these negative things about her and her conversion. She was very sincere and focused and dedicated. There was one day where she was sitting and discussing what bracha (blessing) you make on sushi b/c it has rice but it also has fish and which bracha takes priority. So before you go assuming anything and spreading your false rumors based on the false media, why don't you go back to your little kollel and relearn the Torah.
"Michal" is probably an assistant of Ivanka's. For your information I have a good source that told me that Ivanka's "conversion" was a total sham. It was fast-tracked and it was only done for the reason of marriage. Ivanka at first refused to convert, hence the break-up, but Jared made sure that her "conversion" was fast and easy. Ivanka was assured that she really didn't have to change her Christian beliefs.
Ivanka only acted "sincere, focused and dedicated" because she wanted to desperately marry her billionare lover. This is why Ivanka still dressed like a hoochie even after her so-called conversion was complete. Ivanka's a fraud just like her immoral daddy.
You should go and learn about Halakha. You might learn something about what defines a sincere convert and realize that Ivanka is not one. By the way I'm sick and tired of hearing about Ivanka being a Jew when in reality she's about as Jewish as the Pope.
Miriam What god,Religion was invented by men for men to rule other men.
Why can't we accept this as it is. How do we benefit from taking the nmarriage apart by disecting the conversion and the motives for conversion and marriage. She did it and it doesn't matter if it was done orthodox, cconservative or reform. She did it and mazol tov to the couple and only they and their families have to justify and honor the ceremony of marriage. May the couple have a long and happy marriage. The strict interpretation of the orthodox serves only one group of Jews.Let's move on and accept those who want to join us. Welcome Ivanka.
Perhaps we should refrain from lashon hara and wish the couple the best. Mrs. Kushner has taken on the yoke of the Torah, and only God can see into her heart and know how she carries it.
If so many posters are determined to invalidate an Orthodox conversion, what would they have said about a Reform or Reconstructionist conversion? When an Israeli Beth Din tried to retroactively revoke conversions done by the Israeli Orthodox Chief Rabbinate we recognized this insanity for what it was, so why engage in the same attitude ourselves? The Torah forbids us to oppress the convert or to even remind converts of their own past. I wish the happy couple a hertzliche Mazel Tov !
"Biz hunddert azoi ve tavantsik,"
Comment boards seems to get so nasty so quickly. This poster wrote, "For your information I have a good source that told me that Ivanka's 'conversion' was a total sham." I would like to see proof of that." Just like Michal, I spoke to people who saw Ivanka at shul and it is horrible LaShon Harah to say bad things about the shul, KJ, or the conversion process without definite proof. Just writing hateful things here in this forum from anonymous sources is disgusting. I would give the rabbis there the benefit of the doubt because I have met several of them and I have talked to them about the conversion programs--it is certainly not a sham. They take it very seriously.
From what I have heard about Ivanka is that she is a very mature, accomplished and wonderful person--and I can provide a name of a person who knows her very well and has stated this. I don't think she would waste her time doing something so big and life altering as a conversion without 100% commitment to it.
I thought the same thing David Stevens wrote, "Ivanka, i'm sure, has other suitors who had wealth and were not Jews. The best of everything to them." It would be interesting to know a bit more about her decision to make such a huge change in her life.
Would have been better to have had Alex Rodriquez as a Jew if he had gone ahead and married Madonna, but Ivanka isn't a bad consolation prize.
thank you Forward, all was needed to be said was, a blessing on them.
Step back, let us see what G-D has plan for her, nothing is done with out G-D ok's remember Job. Let us not become her stumbling block, let us become her blessing. A wise person makes their father happy....
Forward, do not copyright my words, they belong to me alone and their mine to give freely when I want and who I want. I don't trust in this world, but in the world to come and the kingdom of G-D the government is just. If you are of G-D, you will not do this to me. So let see who you are in heart and mind,,,Forward.
I have seen good men fall, due to power.
I think Ivanka's conversion is fraud. She writes in her twitter page: # Just left dinner at the Standard Grill...sampled more desserts than was absolutely necessary 7:01 PM Nov 16th
So she goes and eat 2 weeks after the wedding in a none kosher restaurant.
Avi, my friend, get the knife out of you hand. What you think about Ivanka'a conversion, is none of your concern, if you are real a true son of the Living G-D, and if you are what you say you are Jewish. A priest over a nation, that does not belong to you but G-D. You are to be His servents, and embrace others to follow the One True G-D. I love you, but sad to say ....I do not like this about you.
Do you know G-D cares more what comes out of your mouth, than what goes in? What comes out can kill you, and others. Read the word of G-D today about judging others, is not our G-D the Judge. So, my friend who do you say you are to G-D? Look back at other things I have written about turning....becoming a son of the Living G-D, having the seal of G-D on our minds and hearts. Read today Ps. 2 the Declare Decree, were David was brought forth into the household of G-D, read Ps 51...were we bring our ---free-will offering---and light the desires of our heart and mind (inward parts) from the burning desire in G-D"S own heart for us to turn, put all sin out and to enter in the hidden part, that hidden part, the Rock, the mountain on high, the Capstone to the true temple that all was found in Genesis 28.
Please read, Ps. 101:1-8. and stop thinking your loved better or you are better than anyone. G-D is the G-D of all mankind.
Jeremiah 32...."I am the LORD, the G-D of All Mankind. is anything too hard for Me?"
Isaiah 54....For you Maker is you husband--the LORD Almighty is his name the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; he is called the G-D OF ALL THE EARTH. We are to be one with our G-D....look up the word....walk. Abraham walked with G-D blamless, do you walk as the the fathers of the past? I am a Jew, I walk, with Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob.....and through the power of G-D my Maker, I can put sin out. Iam on the road home, come join me, my friend, let us go up to the mountain of the LORD, our G-D.
Let us serve Him with all we do and say, lets walk in the light of Jabob, and let us sing of His praises, of the plans that He has pland long ago for us. Remember this....Prophet Obadiah was an Edomite who embraced the One True G-D. Do not be her stumbling block, pray for her and him.
It is written in Amos 9 I will raise up the tabernale of David that is fallen.... Read all of Amos...you will weep, not all who think they are....are who they say, they are, for it is written....Amos 9....Behold, the eyes of the LORD G-D are upon the sinful kingdom, and I will destroy it from off the face of the earth; saving that I will not utterly destroy the house of Jacob, saith the LORD.
Avi, my friend, may I share this thought freely with you? I will try it with out wearing you, G-D and His long-range plan for our redemption, and the world, for we are not all the work of His hands.
Listen to Isaiah, and G-D'S commission tho him. It is written in Isaiah 6 ...And he said, Go, tell this people, Hear ye indeed, but understand not; and see ye indeed, but preceive not.
This is our problem,,,,we do not hear, and we do not see!
This is so strange, but yet----G-D says. Isaiah seems to ask why. This is also written in Isaiah 6...."Then said I, LORD, how long? And he answered, Until the cities be wasted with inhabitant, and the hosese without man, and the land be uttetly desolate. And the LORD have removed men far away, and there be a great forsking in the midst of the land....
G-D is telling Isaiah it will last until judgments falls and they are scattered and removed from the land, and the land me forsaken. This was the climazed when Titus the Roman finally destroyed Jerusalem, killed and scattered its inhabitants, and sent them into dispersion for these past two millenniums.
This is for us now my friend, after the scattering, G-D now will be gathering together another company, His Bride, from every people, and tongue and tribe and nation and then when the Bride is complete, G-D will begin to deal with Israel again.
For it is written....Jeremiah 31....Behold, the day-s come, saith the LORD, that I will sow the house of Israel and the house of Judah with the seed of man, and with the seed of beast.
The DNA the gathering together of another company....from every people and tongue and tribe and nation...The Bride you should be concerned with, my friend,,,,,is you and our Beloved. Please, my friend, pray, seek, and repent, turn. All is shown us in the book of Ruth. Think about it, remember the exile of Naomi was temporary ( the rejection of G-D temporary until we turn) During her exile the family was reduced from four to one. ( So it is written in Isaiah, killed and scattered). Only a remnant returned; but before the return, Ruth had been prepared to meet the Bridegroom. Mark this: Jeremiah....when they came back,,,,two diffrent people came. Those who cryed over the destroyed work of man and the temple built by man and called by a name of a man. Those that didnot cry, had their ears and eyes opened to see the marvelous things pland long ago, by our loving G-D. The true temple, that David seen and others that put sin out and walked like Abraham and Isaac and Jacob, in holy unity with G-D.
For it is written......Psalm 118....The Stone the builders rejected has become the capstone; the LORD has done this, and it is marvelous in our eyes. Make note:....in...our...eyes. Many down through our generation have put sin our and entered in, the hidden part, found in..Ps.51. It is written Genesis 28....And this Stone, which I have set for a pillar, shall be G-D'S house: and of all that thou shalt give me I will shrely give tthe tenth unto thee.
This is were the error came in....we broke the two tablets, every generation rejected it. G-D has a purpose for us, we must fullfill it. that is to turn back and become the full person we were to be created in....Man...the mirror image of our G-D. Then is said of us a child is given a son is born... For it is written....Isaiah 9....For unto us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on His shoulders. And he will be called Counselor..... This is a Declared Decree found in Psalm 2 were G-D brought David froth into the household of G-D like he did Abraham, Isaac and Jacob and others who put sin our G-D in.
For it is written.....Job 33....The Spirit of G-D made me,(flesh, below, sin, death) but the breath of the Almighty gives me life. (above, no sin can enter in, everlasting life in the breath of the Almighty that has given you a second eternal life, a child is given up a son is born.) The holy union of heaven and earth, the Spirit of G-D and the Almighty.
You then fulfill your purpose of life that the Spirit of G-D gave you.
For it is written....Psalm 57....I cry out to G-D Most High, to G-D, who fulfills His purpose for me.
When we turn....it is written of us.....Psalm 89....He will call out to me, 'You are my Father, my G-D, the Rock my Savior,'
We need no man no woman, we need G-D, he alone will be all to us. Let us my friend, be the Righteous Root the Everliving Plant, for our G-D is Forever giving life, we are his name sake....he is the Plant of Renown, Mahtah L'Shaym, who supplies all that we will ever need.
Forward...these words are free...if to protect me you coppyright them, put them in the name of G-D'S holy children, Forward a son of the Living G-D, who brings about unity to the world, the work of G-D'S hands.
We are not all the work of His hands....many have been seeded with fallen angels....read the book of Enoch. And see what was found in the book of Jasher....For it is written...Joshua 10..."Is not this written in the Book of Jasher?" 2 Samual 1...."Behold, it iw written in the Book of Jasher".
Behold....G-D wants you to seek the truth...to know the truth and Truth will----MAKE---YOU-----TO KNOW---WISDOM----IN THE HIDDEN PART, THE GATE THE ANGLE WILL NOT LET YOU PASS UNTIL SIN IS PUT OUT.
Forward, my english is bad, my spelling well, and my typing is not the best far from it....G-D must laugh...at my attempt...my prayers, are the best...may He embrace them for the sake of the world, give him yours....there is no spelling...the words that have in thy presence is fullness of joy; at they right hand there are pleasures forevermore"
Psalm 46....speaks of ...."There is a river, the streams. Think! Most all the great cities of the world are built on the banks of broad, and deep streams, but nevertheless Jerusalem had---NO---river. So this is an idea of a Heavenly Jerusalem in which this saying finds its final and fullest realization. Think! Whose Builder and Maker is G-D the final fullment of the promise....when one turns and enters in the city of our G-D, the holy place of the tabernacles (the hidden part, and the inward parts in Psalm 51)....heavenly Jerusalem the vision of Ezekiel was more than the earthly Zion he knew, when he wrote....There is a river, the streams whereof shall make glad the city of G-D, the holy place of the tabernacles of the most High"
The Rock, the Capstone, the Mount Zion in scripture, the hidden part, and the inward parts....the two sided stones of law. We turn and come into the city of the Living G-D, the heavenly Jerusalem and ot innumerable hosts of angels, to the general assembly, we will be His fist born.. Mankind need time, I pray to heal. May they all call on the LORD Who Heals You. Exodus 15....He said, " If you listen carefully to the voice of the LORD your G-D and do what is right in His eyes, if you pay attention to His commands and keep all His decrees, I will not bring on you any of these deseases I brought on the Egyptianss, for I am the LORD, who heals you.
G-D is Sovereign. G-D had said, they would not receive their King, and to prevent G-D from becoming King.
For it is written.....Psalm 10...the LORD is King for ever and ever; the nations will perish from his land.
He is our King Eternal Joel 2....And everyone who calls on the name of the LORD will be saved.
Psalm 24 Lift up your heads, O you gated; be lifted up, you ancient doors, that the King of Glory may come in. Who is this King of glory? The LORD strong and mighty, the LORD mighty in battle.
KING OF THE NATIONS for it is written....Jeremiah 10....Who should not revere You, O King of the nations? This is Your due, Among all the wise men of the nations and in all kingdoms, there is no one like You.
Meh-lekh Ha Goy-yeem all the nations!
Mankind wanted a human or other a seed from one of the fallen angels, as their king. The King Eternal, was rejected by all.
In Isaiah 53....the prophet is looking and seeing the Redeemer the rejection of G-D and cried. Not the rejection of a human , AS REDEEMER--NO, no, no, the people of all nations were rejection G-D who is their Redeemer, and Saviour.
For it is written...Psalm 19 ...May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in Your sight, O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer.
G-D does not sin there is no sin found in G-D, His words are truth. The world has set up a human as king and redeemer, saviour, and called his name Lord, but nevertheless, Our true Redeemer and King, is our G-D. We reject him when we will not turn back. No man can bring in salvation to G-D. Only G-D can do all things and knows all things..... Jeremiah 31 is where the new covenant is and were G-D brings order to all nations and brings Gentiles and children that have come from fallen angels a chance for true salvation, and to call their Maker King. Eternal King. We have fallen deep with in the lie and deceit that covers us....we can not see or hear the truth...
Why Ivanka is not using her Hebrew name yael?
Ivanka----Yael in hebrew.....(jael was a heroinein in scripture. yael means to ascend, my prayer is that she climes the holy mountain of the LORD. For her name also means to asend and mountain goat! And it also signifying strength of G-D, may this all be given her.
May the name also be added her....Yetra (Jethra is the feminine from Yitro (Jethro). Yitro meaning "wealth and riches" in the hidden part, the promise land above. For all the wealth and riches of this world will soon past away, one can not take them, were we are to go. Let Yaffa be added (Jaffa) means beautiful, for the spirit that will be brought forth when she will turn, and put sin out. For dust to dust, ashes to ashes and spirit to Spirit. Let G-D call her Yael, Yitra , Yaffa --if it be his will for her.