NEWS ITEM: Golf-champ Tiger Woods has apologized for “transgressions” against his wife and family. He issued this comment after causing an early-morning auto mishap outside his mansion. Meanwhile, new reports of extra-marital affairs continue to circulate.
His feats are part of golfing lore!
His fans just love to see him score!
Did he engage, to all intents,
In trysts, and call them sports events?
Does he deserve our scorn, our snubs,
For swinging more than golfing clubs?
His caddies wonder “was he bad?”
Is he a hero or a cad?
’Tis certain he possessed the means,
This legend of the golfing greens.
Of all the sorts and kinds and types,
A tiger cannot change his stripes.
His many sponsors, we surmise,
Won’t keep his name on merchandise.
Though good at moving lots of goods,
One doubts he’ll come out of the woods!