Natalie Portman, Queen of the Jews, Releases Startling New Ad
Image by Screengrab/YouTube
I believe that Natalie Portman is an extremely advanced android developed in secret by the highest level of IDF engineers to generate positive press for Israel and world Jewry. Portman’s new perfume ad for Dior only reinforces my argument.
In the ad, Portman sucks gently on the end of a pair of sunglasses. She wraps a sheet around her naked body and screams at a man to prove his love for her. She tucks a hank of hair naughtily behind her ear and then leaps from a pier in a ballgown. She laughs while being chased through various locations. She is yanked backwards down the French Riviera. She pushes someone over. She shrieks while clutching a pole. She has intimate sex on very clean sheets. She embraces a man in the back of a bus while dressed like a Flamenco dancer. She exhales, eyes closed, as a man wraps his hands around her neck. Finally, she and a group of beautiful white women drive a pink convertible on the beach, spelling out the word “love” in cursive. “And you?” she asks. “What would you do for love?”
The better question:
What would you do to live in a world where corporations couldn’t easily trick a beautiful actress/android into selling women scented pesticides in a 45-second male fantasy where being chased and pushed is equated to love?
Enjoy the full spectacle here:
I hope you appreciated this article. Before you go, I’d like to ask you to please support the Forward’s award-winning journalism this Passover.
In this age of misinformation, our work is needed like never before. We report on the news that matters most to American Jews, driven by truth, not ideology.
At a time when newsrooms are closing or cutting back, the Forward has removed its paywall. That means for the first time in our 126-year history, Forward journalism is free to everyone, everywhere. With an ongoing war, rising antisemitism, and a flood of disinformation that may affect the upcoming election, we believe that free and open access to Jewish journalism is imperative.
Readers like you make it all possible. Right now, we’re in the middle of our Passover Pledge Drive and we need 500 people to step up and make a gift to sustain our trustworthy, independent journalism.
Make a gift of any size and become a Forward member today. You’ll support our mission to tell the American Jewish story fully and fairly.
— Rachel Fishman Feddersen, Publisher and CEO
Join our mission to tell the Jewish story fully and fairly.
Our Goal: 500 gifts during our Passover Pledge Drive!
