Real Men Marry Rabbis
Graphic by Angelie Zaslavsky
It’s a truism that fashion trends repeat themselves. Sure, there may be a new style, but it’s really just a repeat of an old one, usually with some small variations on the theme. It’s just too bad that when low-rise bell bottoms were big a few years ago, I wasn’t able to wear them and channel the six-year old I was when they were first in fashion. Maybe some women were willing to risk the muffin-top look for the sake of nostalgia, but I sure wasn’t.
Since I am not at all a big clothes shopper, I am always happy when something I already have in my closet (and still fits) comes back in style, or can be re-purposed in some fashionable way. It is usually flattering for a designer to see teenage girls walking down the street in garments (or knock-offs thereof) they produced decades earlier for the girls’ mothers, or even grandmothers.
I am hoping this is how Rabbi Rachel Silverman will feel if she sees the t-shirt she created back in 2006 worn today, but with a different intention in mind on the part of its wearers.
At the time Silverman first created her “Real men marry rabbis” t-shirts, when she was herself a rabbinical student at the Jewish Theological Seminary, the message she was trying to convey was a pro-egalitarian Judaism one. She was focused on ritual gender equality, as in women reading Torah, wearing tefillin, and being rabbis (among other things).
Nowadays, some of us — those of us living in Prop 8-Land (California), for instance — might naturally read a Jewish pro-gay marriage message into the t-shirt’s slogan. This may not, perhaps, be Silverman’s initial intention with her t-shirts, but I’d recommend she just go with the flow, as do all fashion designers who put up with what consumers do to personalize their style (think ripped jeans and t-shirts).
If the original intention of the product was to promote egalitarianism, then I think that according to the spirit of the law, everything should be cool…including the extra cash Rabbi Silverman could make from sales to this secondary market. It may be a smaller market than the primary one, but I alone know of several guys for whom this t-shirt would be a perfect fit.
Renee Ghert-Zand blogs at Truth, Praise and Help, where this post was originally published.
This is a moment of great uncertainty. Here’s what you can do about it.
We hope you appreciated this article. Before you go, we’d like to ask you to please support the Forward’s independent Jewish news this Passover.
This is a moment of great uncertainty for the news media, for the Jewish people, and for our sacred democracy. It is a time of confusion and declining trust in public institutions. An era in which we need humans to report facts, conduct investigations that hold power to account, tell stories that matter and share honest discourse on all that divides us.
With no paywall or subscriptions, the Forward is entirely supported by readers like you. Every dollar you give this Passover is invested in the future of the Forward — and telling the American Jewish story fully and fairly.
The Forward doesn’t rely on funding from institutions like governments or your local Jewish federation. There are thousands of readers like you who give us $18 or $36 or $100 each month or year.
Support our mission to tell the Jewish story fully and fairly.
