Pat Robertson Says Jews Don’t Mow Lawns

By Anne Cohen April 1, 2014

Pat Robertson has succeeded where thousands of years of Elders of Zion-style conspiracy theorists have failed.

He’s figured out why Jews are all so darn successful.

It’s simple, the televangelist explained in a recent discussion with Rabbi Daniel Lapin, head of the American Alliance of Jews and Christians — Jews don’t tinker with their cars or mow their own lawns, which leaves them with all the time in the world to pursue their true passion: Polishing diamonds.

Whew. Glad we cleared that up. Now back to counting my gold dubloons.

[h/t Gawker]

Anne Cohen was the Forward’s deputy digital media editor. When she’s not looking for the secret Jewish history of Voodoo in New Orleans, or making lists about Ruth Bader Ginsburg, she writes for The Assimilator. She graduated from the Columbia Graduate School of Journalism with an M.S. magazine concentration in 2012.