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The Schmooze

‘Crazy Ex-Girlfriend’ Brings You the Best Jewish Rap Battle Ever

We’ve already sung the praise of Rachel Bloom’s amazing CW “Crazy Ex-Girlfriend.” But this week’s episode featured an especially wonderful, extra Jewish rap-battle. Or rather, a JAP battle. And it’s all kinds of meshugge, in the best of ways.

Just like the show’s other songs, it’s musically and lyrically on point. It also gets pretty vicious and pretty poignant, and may be a bit too familiar for high-achieving Jewish girls.

Rachel Bloom’s character, Rebecca Bunch, a lawyer who left New York is pitted against her childhood rival, who is, of course, also a lawyer, Audra Levine. It’s a “beef of two hardass Shebrews from Scarsdale.”

The offenses they throw at each other include shandes like indiscretions at the “bathroom stall of the Matzah ball.” Levine tells Bunch she’s “tripping like Birthright.”

The rap includes such wonderful lines as, “sheket be’vakashut the hell up.” Wish we could’ve used that one in Hebrew school.

In a very brief truce between the two Jewish princesses, they both agree that they’re “cool with black people.” The two rap together:

“Cos we’re liberal, duh, Progressive as hell, Though of course I support Isra-el.”

Yes, this rap battle is biblically epic, and there’s a reason why. It was written by Jewish rap mayven Zach Sherwin, who is also responsible for “Epic Rap Battles of History” and this strangely catchy rap about krav maga.

So just in case you haven’t caught on yet, this is a PSA. “Crazy Ex-Girlfriend” is Jewish musical comedy at its finest, and you should be watching.

Watch the entire rap battle bellow. Watch out, there are some dirty words:

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