How to Wear Hanukkah Swag Without Offending Anyone

Image by Screenshot: Amazon
♫ On the first day of Hanukkah my true love gave to me, a dreidel with a stripper on top.♫
Not even two weeks after the offensive , we have entered the Hanukkah season minefield.
As if Jewish women don’t deal with enough stereotypes, a novelty item just sprinkled some salt on the wound. According to Kveller Nordstrom was forced to take down a Hanukkah sweater with the words “Chai Maintenance” and “Hanukkah J.A.P.” embroidered next to a Star of David and a menorah from their website.
Unsurprisingly, the male version of the novelty top just featured a cute “Oy Vey,” adding the kitsch without any of the negative spoiled/rich/brat connotation.

Image by Kveller
All this had us thinking — what other crazy Hanukkah swag is out there in the world of online retailers?
Here’s what we found:
As soon as Seth Rogen’s “The Night Before” hits theaters, this star-knit-wonder will be at every Ugly Holiday party come December.

Image by Night Before
You can have a little “Annie Hall” Woody Allen action going on for eight crazy nights.

Image by Screenshot: Tipsy Elves
What? No, just no.

Image by Screenshot: Zazzle
Step 1: Crown Heights sweater. Step 2: Monsey, New Square and Williamsburg?

Image by Screenshot: Amazon
See, you can look like a schmuck without being a schmuck!

Image by Screenshot: Amazon
We’re not going to lie, this is really cute.

Image by Screenshot: Amazon
Whoever designed this sweater: the Jerk Store called, they’re running out of you!

Image by Screenshot: Zazzle
Can we all agree right now to never, ever, ever buy this?

Image by Screenshot: Amazon
The only thing offensive about this is the searing pain it causes our eyes. Otherwise, go for it!

Image by Screenshot: Amazon
Everything about this T-shirt is amazing. May the Schwartz be with you!

Image by Screenshot: Etsy
This reindeer might be confusing Hanukkah with Rosh Hashanah, but thanks for the good wishes either way!

Image by Screenshot: Amazon
Hanukkah Harry agrees.

Image by Screenshot: Amazon
Subtly festive.

Image by Screenshot: Zazzle
Keep warm with an appropriate sweater and Happy Hanukkah!
The Forward is free to read, but it isn’t free to produce

I hope you appreciated this article. Before you go, I’d like to ask you to please support the Forward.
Now more than ever, American Jews need independent news they can trust, with reporting driven by truth, not ideology. We serve you, not any ideological agenda.
At a time when other newsrooms are closing or cutting back, the Forward has removed its paywall and invested additional resources to report on the ground from Israel and around the U.S. on the impact of the war, rising antisemitism and polarized discourse.
This is a great time to support independent Jewish journalism you rely on. Make a gift today!
— Rachel Fishman Feddersen, Publisher and CEO
Support our mission to tell the Jewish story fully and fairly.
Most Popular
- 1
Opinion The dangerous Nazi legend behind Trump’s ruthless grab for power
- 2
Opinion A Holocaust perpetrator was just celebrated on US soil. I think I know why no one objected.
- 3
Culture Did this Jewish literary titan have the right idea about Harry Potter and J.K. Rowling after all?
- 4
Opinion I first met Netanyahu in 1988. Here’s how he became the most destructive leader in Israel’s history.
In Case You Missed It
-
Fast Forward Trump administration restores student visas, but impact on pro-Palestinian protesters is unclear
-
Fast Forward Deborah Lipstadt says Trump’s campus antisemitism crackdown has ‘gone way too far’
-
Fast Forward 5 Jewish senators accuse Trump of using antisemitism as ‘guise’ to attack universities
-
Fast Forward Jewish Democratic Rep. Jan Schakowsky reportedly to retire after 26 years in office
-
Shop the Forward Store
100% of profits support our journalism
Republish This Story
Please read before republishing
We’re happy to make this story available to republish for free, unless it originated with JTA, Haaretz or another publication (as indicated on the article) and as long as you follow our guidelines.
You must comply with the following:
- Credit the Forward
- Retain our pixel
- Preserve our canonical link in Google search
- Add a noindex tag in Google search
See our full guidelines for more information, and this guide for detail about canonical URLs.
To republish, copy the HTML by clicking on the yellow button to the right; it includes our tracking pixel, all paragraph styles and hyperlinks, the author byline and credit to the Forward. It does not include images; to avoid copyright violations, you must add them manually, following our guidelines. Please email us at [email protected], subject line “republish,” with any questions or to let us know what stories you’re picking up.