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The Secret History of BiBi-8
As “Star Wars: The Force Awakens” continues to rack up historic box office grosses, director JJ Abrams has confirmed a theory floating around internet forums and the Israeli Foreign Ministry — that the lovable, squeaky droid “BB-8” was inspired by the unlovable Israeli Prime Minister Bibi Netanyahu. “Both Bibi and BB take stands against fearful…
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California Adopts Israeli Tactics To Fight Drought
To help it cope with a historic drought, California is turning to Israeli desalination technology to help boost the water supply. What other Israeli strategies are Californians adopting to fight the drought? First the municipal government of San Luis Obispo replaced the town’s customary greeting of “Have a nice day!” with “What’s it to you,…
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With Rep at Stake Drake-Bernie Beef Heats Up
Even as the presidential race heats up, Democratic candidate Bernie Sanders has found his attention sidetracked by another bitter rivalry. For reasons that remain hazy, the Brooklyn-born Vermont socialist is locked in a beef with Canadian-Jewish rapper Drake. Their mutual friend Killer Mike has tried to broker a peace, but to no avail. The beef…
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Jews, Arabs and Bedouin Help Middle Eastern Refugees on Aegean Island Haven
Visibly disoriented in the night’s darkness, Muntasira Hamawi teetered out of a rubber boat and onto the foggy shore of Lesbos, the third largest of Greece’s islands in the Aegean — where an Israeli volunteer speaking her language immediately began attending to her needs. “You’ve arrived and you are safe. We are here to help…
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TrumpMoshiach Is Here!
Make Olam Hazeh Great Again! 0
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Millennials Postpone B’nei Mitzvot Until Their ’30s
Please send checks. Every $18 helps.
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Bidets Not BDS
At a recent board meeting of suburban Temple Emuna Gedola, president Steven Spielberg (not that one) deftly steered the conversation away from how the congregation should deal with Israel’s behavior in the occupied territories back to the ongoing bathroom renovations.
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Santa Claus Furor
Second grader Stevie Cohen dropped a bombshell on his second grade classmates yesterday morning — Santa Claus does not exist. Cohen, retaliating for a stolen eraser, loudly informed his former best friend Arthur Grant that there is no Santa Claus and that Christmas presents come from parents. The announcement turned Miss Richard’s language arts class…
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ADL Discovers the Billionth Anti-Semite
Nearly a year after Abe Foxman left his post as National Director of the Anti-Defamation League he returned to the national gala to celebrate the organization’s discovery of the billionth anti-Semite. “When I began at the ADL there were only a few million Jew-haters scattered across Europe and North America”, he said. “Last year our…
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Backward Reveals Newly Absorbent Napkin-Format Print Edition
In a letter to subscribers, new Backward owner, the virile Sheldon Adelson announced that the newspaper’s print edition is undergoing an extensive redesign to allow this august paper to be printed entirely on a small paper napkin. “In the old days, my father used the Backward to wrap the fish he sold from his pushcart,”…
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Cars Observe the Fourth Commandment, or Do They?
Self-driving cars. Can they drive themselves to shul? And if they can, are they part of the minyan?
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Fast Forward Unarmed man who tackled Bondi Beach Hanukkah attacker identified as Ahmed al-Ahmed
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Opinion I grew up believing Australia was the best place to be Jewish. This Hanukkah shooting forces a reckoning I do not want.
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Fast Forward Hanukkah shooting leaves at least 15 dead at Australia’s most popular beach
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Fast Forward Father and son suspects in Bondi Beach Hanukkah attack identified as Sajid and Naveed Akram by law enforcement
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Fast Forward Zohran Mamdani visits the Rebbe’s Ohel, increasingly a pilgrimage site for politicians
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Culture In making a Christian case for Shabbat, Charlie Kirk stripped off its Judaism
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News Christians are displaying menorahs in their windows post-Bondi Beach attack. Why some Jews object
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Opinion My religion was ‘None of the above,’ until Oct. 7 and now Bondi
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