Skip To Content
Get Our Newsletter
JEWISH. INDEPENDENT. NONPROFIT.

Support the Forward

Funded by readers like you DonateSubscribe
The Schmooze

Stephen Colbert Offers To Live-Circumcise ‘Jewish’ Paul Ryan On His Show

Stephen Colbert really tore Paul Ryan a new one this weekend.

Responding to last week’s revelation that Catholic Speaker of the House Paul Ryan has roughly 3 percent Ashkenazi-Jewish ancestry, Colbert asked the question weighing on so many of our hearts: “Haven’t the Jewish people suffered enough?”

He went on to point out that if Ryan really is Jewish he should be circumcised — and it’s not “shear” (hehe) imagination to think he could be — adult male converts to Judaism who were not previously circumcised usually undergo a symbolic bloodletting, as this Forward writer explains in a harrowing account. Ryan, who has joked that he’s now “officially a member of the family” should pay “the price of admission,” argued Colbert — a traditional brit-milah, or ritual circumcision.

“That’s why we at The Late Show are excited to offer you the chance of a lifetime with The Late Show’s Live Paul Ryan Bris-stravaganza!” he announced. “Mohels are standing by,” he said, explaining that Ryan is welcome to drop by the show for a live communal event.

“Think of it this way, Paul,” he said. “The foreskin is only one percent of the penis. And we know how much you love cuts for the one percent.”

Watch the full clip here:

Jenny Singer is the deputy lifestyle editor for the Forward. You can reach her at Singer@forward.com or on Twitter @jeanvaljenny

Engage

  • SHARE YOUR FEEDBACK

  • UPCOMING EVENT

    NY-12 Candidate Forum

    THE TEMPLE EMANU-EL STREICKER CENTER and Virtual

    Aug 10, 2022

    7 pm ET · 

    Will the last Jew left in New York’s congressional delegation be reelected? Will New York’s senior congresswoman receive another term? Or will one of the newcomers upend Manhattan politics?

Republish This Story

Please read before republishing

We’re happy to make this story available to republish for free under an Attribution-Non Commercial-No Derivatives Creative Commons license as long as you follow our republishing guidelines, which require that you credit Foward and retain our pixel. See our full guidelines for more information.

To republish, copy the HTML, which includes our tracking pixel, all paragraph styles and hyperlinks, the author byline, and credit to Foward. Have questions? Please email us at help@forward.com.

We don't support Internet Explorer

Please use Chrome, Safari, Firefox, or Edge to view this site.