The Forward’s Debate Drinking Game

By Forward Staff October 16, 2012

At the Forward, we’re always looking for ways to help our readers stay in touch with current events from a Jewish perspective.

In that spirit, we’ve come up with a Jewish drinker’s guide to tonight’s presidential debate.

After his lackluster performance two weeks ago, it’s President Barack Obama’s shot at debate redemption. Mitt Romney can seal the deal with another commanding performance. Joe Biden won’t be anywhere near your TV screen, so hopefully you don’t have to worry about “malarkey.”

Get some booze, grab your remote and play along.

Take a SIP if you hear:

“The only democracy in the Middle East…”
“Red lines”
An anecdote about a Jewish lady in Florida/Ohio/Nevada or some other random swing state
Anyone over-pronouncing Hamas as “Kkkkkhamas”
“My friend Benjamin Netanyahu…”
A properly employed Yiddishism

Pound a SHOT for:

“My Friend Bibi…”
“Choo-tzpah,” or any other butchered Yiddishism
“Jerusalem is Israel’s eternal capital”
A questioner with an unmistakable Long Island Jewish accent
“The insatiable crocodile of militant Islam”

And CHUG the entire bottle of whatever you got:

If anyone pulls out a marker and a bomb cartoon

EXTRAS…

Anyone mention the Holocaust? Pour a shot out on the floor.
Pop a bottle if either candidate brings the Miami Boys Choir out on stage to sing “Hinei Mah Tov u’Mah Naiim.”
When they say “Ahmadinejad,” stamp your feet like in synagogue on Purim.

The Forward’s staff contributors are listed in our masthead.

The views and opinions expressed in this article are the author’s own and do not necessarily reflect those of the Forward. Discover more perspectives in Opinion. To contact Opinion authors, email [email protected].

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