Does This Mean You’re, Like Totally Orthodox?
Graphic by Angelie Zaslavsky
SHORT, SERIOUS ANSWER: Either, “Yup, totally Orthodox!” Or “I keep kosher, but of the three main levels of Judaism, Orthodox, Conservative and Reform, I’d consider myself…” whichever the case may be.
MORE EFFECTIVE RETORT: “Yeah, I keep kosher and many people who keep kosher don’t pray nine times a day or have curly sideburns.” Again, Nemko says levity and brevity are key to responding, especially if the question feels rather accusatory. Acknowledging the image they may have in their heads and including it in your response cuts through the tension.
CONCISE COMEBACK: “Lobster, shmobster. It’s just food.”
3. You can’t eat pepperoni pizza?
Click for your answer options.
This is a moment of great uncertainty. Here’s what you can do about it.
We hope you appreciated this article. Before you go, we’d like to ask you to please support the Forward’s independent Jewish news. All donations are still being matched by the Forward Board - up to $100,000 until April 24.
This is a moment of great uncertainty for the news media, for the Jewish people, and for our sacred democracy. It is a time of confusion and declining trust in public institutions. An era in which we need humans to report facts, conduct investigations that hold power to account, tell stories that matter and share honest discourse on all that divides us.
With no paywall or subscriptions, the Forward is entirely supported by readers like you. Every dollar you give is invested in the future of the Forward — and telling the American Jewish story fully and fairly.
The Forward doesn’t rely on funding from institutions like governments or your local Jewish federation. There are thousands of readers like you who give us $18 or $36 or $100 each month or year.
Support our mission to tell the Jewish story fully and fairly.
