Shiva
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Culture 19 reasons why shiva is like a Phish concert
My mother loved a party. In fact, my mother was a party! She loved art and theater and literature, and subcultures of the high and lowbrow varieties; she fled her parents’ strict home at 22 to find herself in swinging London, looking the part in Twiggy eyeliner and a mod haircut. It changed the course…
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Culture In ‘Shiva Baby,’ Jewish anxiety gets so bad that it turns into a horror movie
I am not claustrophobic. But watching “Shiva Baby,” 26-year-old Emma Seligman’s first feature film, I felt the walls closing in on me. Ariel Marx’s high-pitched and plunky soundtrack felt akin to the “Psycho” score’s shrieking violins and I could feel my cortisol rising throughout the entire runtime. While the film bills itself as a comedy,…
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Culture On saying kaddish over Zoom
My mother died four days into 2021. Zoom burial, Zoom shiva, and now, Zoom kaddish. Every morning, I log on and watch the usual suspects arrive at my synagogue’s Shacharit service. They pop up, one by one, in their boxes. Hi, everyone. Hi, S. who puts her earrings on before the service starts. Hi, A….
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Community A year into COVID, Zoom funerals are still surreal
I waited outside the main office building of Beth Moses Cemetery in Long Island. It was a bright, cold day. I’d been there many times before. Normally the spot is a swirl of activity, with cars snaking around every driveway, funeral directors talking shop in small clumps and crowds of mourners greeting one another with…
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Culture In a heartbreaking tribute to his son, Jamie Raskin normalizes discussion of suicide among Jews
Tommy Raskin was, by all accounts, a deeply empathetic individual, whether fighting on behalf of humans or animals. His father, Rep. Jamie Raskin of Maryland, wrote in a statement published on Medium that his son “hated cliques and social snobbery, never had a negative word for anyone but tyrants and despots, and opposed all malicious…
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Culture How I Learned Shiva
Forty-one years ago this coming week, I walked with sleepless eyes and a weary heart to the front door of my childhood home, where an unexpected visitor had just shown up for my mother’s shiva. If I recall correctly, he was wearing faded jeans, a denim jacket and hippie work boots —his usual outfit —…
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Culture Sitting Shiva for Spot?
As I peer down at her cotton-puff head, my sense of guilt sets in. Peeps, my bichon frise associate, has just taken a cocktail of three different medicines meant to keep her ticker ticking. Her eyes water, and her mouth turns downward, quivering slightly. It’s obvious she is not digging this new regimen. At 13,…
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Community When a shiva is cut short
Shiva, the traditional Jewish mourning period for close relatives, is normally seven days long. It makes sense that shiva should be seven days. Seven (shiva in Hebrew) is a number with special significance in Judaism. The seven-branched menorah, a symbol of Judaism since ancient times. The seven times a bride circles the groom at the…
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