An Elvis-Themed Israel Tour, For Only $4,000
Image by Getty Images
Elvis Costello shunned Israel a couple of years ago, cancelling a gig on grounds of conscience. But it seems that Israel is just the destination to celebrate the mightier, even more famous Elvis.
On Thursday, tickets went on sale for a $3,995 Elvis Presley themed tour of Israel. No kidding — check it out for yourself.
Special guests on the trip will include Elvis Imperials members Joe Moscheo and Terry Blackwood, and Bill Baize, former member of JD Sumner and The Stamps. But apart from the tenuous connection these guests provide, it’s difficult to see what Elvis has to do with this tour (he never visited Israel). The itinerary features all the standard Israeli sites.
Maybe the organizers need some rewritten Elvis lyrics to use as a soundtrack for the trip. The Shmooze is happy to offer suggestions.
For when visiting Temple Mount, where Jewish tradition mandates avoiding the most sacred spot, a variation on
on “Blue Suede Shoes”:
Well, it’s one for the money, Two for the show, Three to get ready, Now go, cat, go. But don’t you step on the Holy of Holies You can do anything but lay off of the Holy of Holies.
For visiting the Western Wall, how about a twist on “Cotton Candy Land”?
Pious Jewess is comin’, yes she’s comin’ To sell you a red band, She’ll say zei gesund, a bracha And you’ll be in Kaballah land
For a lecture on Netanyahu-Obama relations, no changes to the original “How’s the World Treating You” lyrics are necessary:
I’ve had nothing but sorrow Since you said we were through There’s no hope for tomorrow How’s the world treating you?
This is a moment of great uncertainty. Here’s what you can do about it.
We hope you appreciated this article. Before you go, we’d like to ask you to please support the Forward’s independent Jewish news this Passover. All donations are being matched by the Forward Board - up to $100,000.
This is a moment of great uncertainty for the news media, for the Jewish people, and for our sacred democracy. It is a time of confusion and declining trust in public institutions. An era in which we need humans to report facts, conduct investigations that hold power to account, tell stories that matter and share honest discourse on all that divides us.
With no paywall or subscriptions, the Forward is entirely supported by readers like you. Every dollar you give this Passover is invested in the future of the Forward — and telling the American Jewish story fully and fairly.
The Forward doesn’t rely on funding from institutions like governments or your local Jewish federation. There are thousands of readers like you who give us $18 or $36 or $100 each month or year.
Support our mission to tell the Jewish story fully and fairly.
