Taxes pay for a lot of great things — roads, public schools, national parks. They also pay for a lot of bad things — war, corporate bailouts, Paul Ryan’s salary.

And here’s something our taxes do not pay for: the right to ask a police officer for a cigarette and then proceed to verbally assault him when he rejects you!

Shia LaBeouf, star of “Even Stevens” and “Disturbia”, learned this the hard way.

WJCL released footage of LaBeouf’s arrest from Saturday night and does he EVER go to war for patriotism!

The video opens with LaBeouf being led from a hotel lobby into a waiting cop car, screaming profanities at the black officer who is arresting him. He tries to argue his way out of custody with points like “I’m an American citizen who pays taxes”,”Why are you arresting me for asking you for cigarettes? I was being nice, you dumb b****”, “You got a president who don’t give a f*** about you, you’re stuck in a police force that doesn’t give a fuck about you, and you wanna arrest white people who give a f***?” and, of course, the classic “I’ve got more millionaire lawyers than you know what to do with you stupid b****.”

Persuasive but no cigar — LaBeouf was booked anyway.

The second half of the video shows the actor at the jail, being led to a cell as he screams at two white officers, “You feel good about life? You feel patriotic about this s***? Don’t you feel white guilt?”

To be fair, there’s no context for his “white guilt” comment so he could’ve been talking about, like, the white European genocide of the American Indians. Who knows.

You can read the full report here if you can’t get enough of LaBeouf’s creative expletives.

Becky Scott is the editor of The Schmooze. Follow her on Twitter, @arr_scott

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