It’s either a quarantine love story…or a truly immersive ad spot for Bumble.

On the latest episode of the podcast Steve-O’s Wild Ride, Tiffany Haddish put an end to months of speculation by confirming her relationship with the rapper Common.

“I’ve lost 20 pounds since I’ve been in this relationship,” Haddish told her host. “I feel more confident in me and it’s not him that’s doing it. I’m just way happier and it’s like knowing I got somebody that cares about me, that really has my back.”

While Haddish first met the Grammy-winning rapper in 2019, when he played her love interest in the mob-wife film “The Kitchen,” they were first linked (pseudo-)romantically in April, when they appeared in a promotional video for Bumble, drumming up interest in the app’s new “virtual date” function. (While making this look even remotely appealing is a Herculean task, when Haddish pointed out that one need not wax one’s eyebrows before a virtual date, the Schmooze was almost enticed.)

The two-minute video they produced, which included flower deliveries, earnest pleas to support local businesses, and a plan to send takeout to frontline workers, seemed like pretty standard manufactured buzz. But it turned out to be only too real — because, contrary to the star-crossed shtick, Haddish and Common have been quarantining in the same house for months. In April Deadline noted that the two appeared at a virtual fundraiser sitting on the same couch. Later, Page Six reported that while Haddish chatted via Instagram Live with Dwayne Wade and Gabrielle Union, Common was doing dishes next to her.

Are they protesting late capitalism by accepting corporate money only to expose the pernicious falsity of modern advertising? Are they on a mission to eliminate toxic masculinity by showing the youth that real men do their own dishes? Are they so eager to show off bae that they don’t care whether their virtual social life embarrasses Bumble?

The Schmooze doesn’t know the answers to any of these questions. Here’s what we do know. “We’ve been f—king,” Haddish very candidly revealed to Steve-O — but only after getting tested for coronavirus first.

That could be a promotional spot in itself — we can’t wait to see the lovebirds partner with Dr. Fauci.

Tiffany Haddish found love with Common during quarantine

Irene Katz Connelly is an editorial fellow at the Forward. You can contact her at connelly@forward.com. Follow her on Twitter at @katz_conn.

The reviews that accompanied the release of “Uncut Gems” covered a lot of ground. They touched on Sandler’s not-totally surprising virtuosity as sympathetic dirtbag Howard Ratner, the film’s nods to the exploitation embedded in the diamond industry, and the disturbing possibility that non-Jewish viewers might leave theaters believing that all the chosen people wear un-rimmed glasses and are at war with several loan sharks at once.

But there was one vital question they left unanswered: exactly how many times do characters in the Safdie brothers’ agita-inducing coup de grâce utter the f-word?

Thanks to a supercut recently released by Netflix, we can now tell you that the answer is 560. Yes, just as the Schmooze signaled she had reached maturity dropping f-bombs at her family dinner table, Sandler flipped the bird to everyone who told him to stick with comedy by enunciating the word in question approximately every 15 seconds in the most serious movie of his career.

UNCUT GEMS has the 4th most F-bombs in movie history, and yes before you ask, here’s all 560 of them pic.twitter.com/sPJj0Ax1Nt— NetflixFilm (@NetflixFilm) July 28, 2020

It may look like a record-breaking number. Unfortunately, “Uncut Gems” ranks a dismal fourth for use of the f-word in feature films. (“The Wolf of Wall Street” is a narrow third with 569 profane utterances. First and second prize go to two films about swearing we’ve never heard of, probably for good reason.)

It’s a fitting proximity to prestige to a truly triumphant film that debuted to nigh-universal acclaim, only to be brutally, bafflingly snubbed at the Oscars.

“Good news: Sandman can stop wearing suits,” Sandler tweeted gamely upon receiving news that, in a year when “The Joker” garnered 11 nominations, “Uncut Gems” received exactly zero.

We bet he won’t give up the swearing.

Tiffany Haddish found love with Common during quarantine

Irene Katz Connelly is an editorial fellow at the Forward. You can contact her at connelly@forward.com.

One of the time-honored traditions of any awards season is watching actors pretending to be caught totally off guard by news of their nominations. Desperate to seem “chill” and “relatable,” these celebrities want us to believe that they are too busy running errands or watching tennis to pay attention to the highest prizes in their craft.

Not so for “Unorthodox” stars Shira Haas and Amit Rahav who, like reasonable people, spent yesterday morning waiting with bated breath to see if the Netflix series, which follows a young Hasidic woman as she leaves her Williamsburg community for a new life in Berlin, would snag an Emmy nomination for Best Limited Series or TV Movie.

I am so happy and so lucky to have had the privilege of portraying this character and to be nominated for it. Thank you to everyone who took part in the show and made this happen. Thank you to everyone who shared their love. I feel it all. I’m truly grateful.
❤️ pic.twitter.com/gcEL076Joj— shirahaas (@shirahaas) July 29, 2020

Reluctant spouses on the show, they’re also real-life neighbors in Tel Aviv, and they watched the virtual nominations announcements from a laptop propped on Haas’s bed. They may look like your average hyper-photogenic couple effortlessly rocking silk loungewear in the middle of the afternoon, but they’re as tense as anyone should be who may or may not win a huge award. You can see Haas perk up and deflate when a nomination for the series “Unbelievable,” titled similarly to “Unorthodox,” is announced. And when they find out that “Unorthodox” really is in the running, they make some of the craziest noises the Schmooze has ever heard.

As Evan Ross Katz, the writer who posted the video put it, “This is so pure.”

This is so pure: UNORTHODOX stars Shira Haas and Amit Rahav react to the show’s eight Emmy nominations including Best Limited Series and Best Actress, Limited Series or TV Movie for Haas. pic.twitter.com/m0f99YIscy— Ξvan Ross Katz (@evanrosskatz) July 28, 2020

Haas, who was also nominated for Best Actress in her category, spoke to a series of breathless interviewers in the hours after her nomination was announced and sounded as adorably astonished as she was in the video. Asked if she expected to receive her first Emmy nod by the age of 25, she replied, “The answer is definitely no, but I feel so very, very grateful. And I always believed in the show, but I’m surprised, to be honest.”

Irene Katz Connelly is an editorial fellow at the Forward. You can contact her at connelly@forward.com.

On Monday, Seth Rogen joined comedian Marc Maron on his podcast “WTF” to chat about his latest flick, “An American Pickle.” The film is a romp through the Lower East Side of Jewish immigrant yore, so it’s fitting that the podcast touched on some key issues of modern American Jewish identity: summer camp, roots in Jersey — and conflicted views on Israel.

Rogen, who went to a Jewish elementary school and faithfully attended a summer camp run by the Labor Zionist youth movement Habonim Dror, had a hot take on the Jewish institutions in which he spent his youth: “the goal was to get young Jewish kids to f—k each other and make more Jews.”

It’s a strategy that works, he admitted: his sister met her husband there, and several of his friends shacked up as a result of summer camp. (For Rogen himself, who has created zero Jews, it hasn’t been as effective.)

Rogen also shared how his own family history influenced his portrayal of Herschel, the hard-scrabble pickle-maker at the heart of the film. “I come from a line of very tough blue collar Jews,” Rogen said, noting a mailman and multiple plumbers in his lineage and adding that, like 99% of Jewish immigrant forebears including the Schmooze’s own, his grandparents owned a deli in New Jersey.

And talking about the experiences of Jewish immigrants like Herschel, who found themselves immigrants in many far-flung countries, Rogen questioned the wisdom of concentrating world Jewry in one land, however holy. “You don’t keep all your Jews in one basket. I don’t understand why they did that. It makes no sense whatever,” he said.

Rogen added that he’s disillusioned with the education he received about the Israeli-Palestinian conflict as a child. “As a Jewish person, like I was fed a huge amount of lies about Israel my entire life,” he said. “You know, they never tell you that […] there were people there. They make it seem like it was just sitting there.”

“We’re going to piss off a bunch of Jews,” Maron said, and both agreed that the prospect of pushback from fellow members of the tribe made criticizing Israel “frightening” (although not that frightening, because they did so on a popular podcast).

There are plenty to agree with them, and plenty who will disagree — vocally. But as Rogen, whose parents met on a kibbutz and who describes himself as “100,000% Jewish,” put it, it’s also his identity that makes him want to speak up. “If anyone can say whatever they f—king want about this s—t, it should be two famous Jewish people,” he quipped.

We don’t think being famous or Jewish qualifies anyone to do anything, much less arbitrate a conflict that involves millions of non-famous non-Jews. But in lobbing an argument-inducing comment across the airwaves, Rogen and Maron were participating in one of the oldest Jewish traditions in existence: the age-old practice of intentionally pissing off other Jews. Have at it, boys.

Irene Katz Connelly is an editorial fellow at the Forward. You can contact her at connelly@forward.com.

In the time it took most of us to stop touching our faces in public, Demi Lovato has shacked up with a member of the tribe — and locked him down for life.

The songstress is engaged to Jewish actor Max Ehrich, less than four months after the two went public with their relationship.

Lovato alerted us to her impending nuptials last week with an extensive slideshow of Ehrich’s beachfront proposal that included color photos of the couple embracing, black-and-white photos of the couple embracing, and the requisite close-ups of a diamond the size of a BMW perched on the singer’s well-manicured finger.

View this post on Instagram

When I was a little girl, my birth dad always called me his “little partner” - something that might’ve sounded strange without his southern cowboy like accent. To me it made perfect sense. And today that word makes perfect sense again but today I’m officially going to be someone else’s partner. @maxehrich - I knew I loved you the moment I met you. It was something I can’t describe to anyone who hasn’t experienced it firsthand but luckily you did too.. I’ve never felt so unconditionally loved by someone in my life (other than my parents) flaws and all. You never pressure me to be anything other than myself. And you make me want to be the best version of myself. I’m honored to accept your hand in marriage. I love you more than a caption could express but I’m ecstatic to start a family and life with you. I love you forever my baby. My partner. Here’s to our future!!!! 😩😭❤️🥰😍 Ps. THANK YOU @angelokritikos FOR HIDING BEHIND ROCKS AND CAPTURING THE ENTIRE THING!!! I love you boo!!!

A post shared by Demi Lovato (@ddlovato) on Jul 22, 2020 at 10:46pm PDT

And for the next few days, both lovebirds were kind enough to satisfy the public’s appetite for even more engagement snaps. Over the weekend Lovato graced us with:

More proposal photos from new, exciting angles.

View this post on Instagram

Best night of my life… still soaking it all up.. I love you baby @maxehrich 💍

A post shared by Demi Lovato (@ddlovato) on Jul 26, 2020 at 1:34pm PDT

A song snippet she wrote about “the best night of my life” (pumped to hear this every day on the radio in six to eight months).

View this post on Instagram

Feeling so grateful so I wrote something… (swipe left) 🤍 ps. @maxehrich took this after telling me to close my eyes on the way to propose to me 🥺🥰 Love you honey..

A post shared by Demi Lovato (@ddlovato) on Jul 24, 2020 at 11:48am PDT

And this video of Ehrich making teen-hearthrob expressions that truly belongs in a Taylor Swift music video.

View this post on Instagram

Magical moments captured by me ✨💍💖 💿: The First Thing You See - Bruno Major

A post shared by Demi Lovato (@ddlovato) on Jul 26, 2020 at 4:28pm PDT

We’re all familiar with Demi Lovato, the erstwhile Disney star through whom a generation of girls vicariously enjoyed chaste summer camp kisses with Joe Jonas. But who exactly is Max Ehrich?

Turns out, he’s a New Jersey native with long roots in the state’s Jewish enclaves: one of his grandfathers attended Weequahic High School, the archetypically Jewish school that provided the grist for many a Philip Roth novel. Like Lovato, Ehrich entered the Disney orbit as a teenager, appearing as a backup dancer. “High School Musical 3.” Since then, he’s snagged four Daytime Emmy nominations for his work on the soap opera “The Young and the Restless.”

The first clues to the pair’s budding romance emerged just like their engagement: on social media. In March, Ehrich started posting pictures of cryptically romantic street art on Instagram, each of which Lovato instantly liked. Just a few weeks later, when the world started falling apart, they let us know they’d decided to take things to the next level: Ehrich posted a shirtless snap from Lovato’s Hollywood Hills house with the caption “when u realize u should’ve packed more for your quarantine stay.”

In the ensuing months, the online bread crumbs piled up: Lovato accidentally appeared in Ehrich’s Instagram Live. Ehrich posted many, many pictures with Lovato’s pups. The two appeared in Justin Bieber’s latest music video, “Stuck By You.” While Lovato was raised Christian, she announced in 2015 that genetic research revealed she was “a little bit Jewish” on her father’s side. For his part, Ehrich has described himself as a practicing Buddhist but also shares the love on Jewish holidays, tweeting to fans on Rosh Hashanah and Passover.

Shana Tova. Let’s have an epic year!— Max Ehrich (@maxehrich) September 4, 2013

He also comes with that most Jewish of accessories, a lovable mom who aggressively kvells about all his Major Life Events.

Over the moon happy for Max and our future daughter Demi!May your lives sine with light and love always❤️ pic.twitter.com/5y4hMGa0Jw— rhonda ehrich (@EhrichRhonda) July 23, 2020

The Schmooze was ready to unleash a disquisition on the pointlessness of perfectly manicured celebrities in whimsical all-white outfits pretending to be surprised by beachfront proposals. But after sifting through this relationship’s Instagram history and reading each and every one of the validating comments that Lovato and Ehrich instantly append to each other’s posts, we found ourselves kind of verklempt at how much they seem like…well, normal people who fell in love and can’t resist talking about it on social media.

In an era when fewer and fewer stars seem at all like us, these ones kind of are.

Irene Katz Connelly is an editorial fellow at the Forward. You can contact her at connelly@forward.com.