It has come to the Backward’s attention that there’s a Clearance Sale on at JC Penney. After the revocation of his Top Secret status by White House chief of staff John Kelly, Jared Kushner is in the market for a new clearance. And, especially after that great deal on his Calvin Klein boxer briefs, JC…
American ultra-Orthodox leaders traveled to Israel this week to tell Israeli officials to ignore liberal American Jews’ demands to allow women to pray at the Western Wall. In statements and documents announcing the trip, the ultra-Orthodox leaders attacked non-Orthodox Jewish groups, saying that while ultra-Orthodoxy is growing, non-Orthodox Jewish movements are “dying,” and that acceding…
Can Levi Sanders shock the political world like his famous dad (almost) did against Hillary Clinton? The odds may seem stacked against Levi Sanders in his quest to win a crowded Democratic primary in New Hampshire’s 1st Congressional District. There are already seven other Democrats vying for the nomination, one of them has already emerged…
Whether you’re a woman of the wall or a man in a black hat punching a woman of the wall, this is the vodka for you! Perfect for blurring the difference between protagonist and antagonist. The drink of choice for discerning Jews. Recommended by Anat Hoffman, Natan Sharansky and Rabbi Shmuel Rabinovitch. Click image to…
In a major scoop, the Backward recovered the following letter from soiled McDonald’s boxes in the White House trash cans. February 7, 2018 Dear Jared, As I’ve watched you over the last two years, your entry into public life, I’ve thought about how much you really are like your old man. You work harder than…
Broward County Sheriff Scott Israel emerged from the school shooting at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida, a hero for his passionate plea that lawmakers empower police and doctors to put people in mental hospitals on the basis of violent social media posts. The Jewish community knew him as someone who was proud…
The national leaders of the Jewish federation system are advising their local members not to take positions on gun control amidst a new national movement on the issue. But the local federation near where the Parkland massacre took place last week isn’t listening. In an internal email sent Thursday, the national umbrella group for Jewish…
“Today we finally acknowledge the obvious: that Jerusalem is Israel’s capital,” President Trump said while hoping he’d used the right denture fixative. “This is nothing more or less than a recognition of reality,” he purred, warming his hands at a beautiful clean coal fire. “It is also the right thing to do. It’s something that…
Editor’s Note: Please read what’s new with our friends at Temple Beth Shalom, just click on the image to enlarge it. It’s been a hectic year, but Purim is a wonderful time to press pause on all the meetings and fundraising and legal settlements and just come together as a community to celebrate. As always,…
Dear Reader: It is with excitement that we announce that this will be the final issue of the Backward as you have known it for five thousand years. After several re-envisioning sessions, numerous re-imagining focus groups and senior management offsite retreats in Hawaii, the Bahamas and the spas of Jerusalem (the eternal capital of the…
From the company who brought you The Goliath, comes the Shield of David. [Editor’s bemused note: This satirical advert was inspired by, but unfortunately not paid for, by an actual six-pointed condom.]
באַזונדערש רירנדיק דאָ זײַנען די בילדער פֿון משפּחה־רײַבונגען, פֿון באַגעגענישן װאָס ברענגען נישט צו קײן עמאָציאָנעלע פֿאַרשטענדיקונגען.
